sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
(here's what I posted on Facebook)

Hey RSCDS Boston friends! You may have seen a survey in your email about role terminology! I strongly encourage you to fill it out. (If you need a link, send me a message --it's open to anyone who dances SCD in the Boston area, no matter if they are beginners or experts, no matter if they are members of a class or free-range.)

Here's what I wrote in the open field at the end. Consider it my open letter to the Scottish Country Dance community.

***

As a nonbinary person, it has been so disappointing to watch the SCD crowd lag behind other dance forms regarding gender-neutral calling. I continually get misgendered at events, in both explicit (wrong pronouns) and implicit ("you look like you're on the wrong side" --I'm agender, I can't "look" like a man or a woman!) ways. I have been called rude for countering people misgendering me, and it has been made very clear to me by multiple dancers that I am not welcome in this community.

It hurts, so much, to hear people cheer for "men and women" and know that they are cheering against my existence. It hurts to hear people whine about how my identity is "confusing" or to just ignore my buttons and pins and frequent reminders of my pronouns. It hurts to stop bothering to correct people after they misgender me again and again and again because they never listen or change or get it right. It hurts to hear people argue and fight against any suggestion of inclusivity. When I started Scottish dancing, I thought the community would be more loving than that, and it hurts to be disappointed again and again.

But I'm here because I love the dance form. I _love_ Scottish Country Dance. I love the precision, I love the power, I love the action, I love the music, I love the fiddly timing and the joyful abandon. I love it and I am damn good at it: I have put a _lot_ of work into learning How To Do This Thing Well and I don't regret that work because the work itself has been joyful.

And I'm here because I believe we _can_ be better as a community. I do see people trying, and I recognize and appreciate that. There are people -more than one- who will hear the wrong pronoun used for me and _speak up_ on my behalf, so I don't have to always be the one making corrections. There are people who are looking at the things that are exclusionary and saying, out loud, "this is wrong, we shouldn't be like this". There are members of Exec and TMC who are saying "how can we be more publicly and loudly inclusive", there are teachers who are saying "how can I shift my language to be more welcoming", there are dancers who are saying "I don't understand but I'm willing to try".

That's why I'm still here. Because every time I receive another metaphorical slap in the face about how my existence is a burden and I am not worth considering, I remember that there are those here fighting to keep me around. And because I believe there could be those in the future who deserve to have their identities respected as well and I want them to have an easier time of it then I have.

***

On a related note, if you are also tired of waiting for the broader community to make space for us, I am going to be starting a gender-free SCD class in hopefully September. I am waiting on venue details (they're in the process of replacing their floor...) but it will be in the middle of Somerville, not far from the Magoun Sq green-line station and with some parking. Most likely 1st/3rd/5th Thursdays from 7-9pm.
If you want to throw me your email address, I'll send proper details when I'm ready to announce the first class.

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
CW: Transphobia

I helped make this survey for this dance group I'm in, and I nobly volunteered to do the data collection for it, and holy fuck.

See, the topic is "what language should we use as a branch to try and be more inclusive". This is, obviously, something I care deeply about (and I'll post my open-letter free response answer to that here in a minute, because I posted it to Facebook and I continue to love y'all more than there.)

The survey has been live for just under two hours. So far I have gotten a comment implying that queer people are the true transphobes (for not thinking women can dance as men?) and another that says we "loud few" are bullies and should go find a different dance form.

I am a fool and the only reason I'm not going to set fire to the entire project right now is the hope that maybe if I take the bad shit now, someone in the future will have a better and easier life, because maybe despite it all we can find some sort of happily ever after and the transphobes will fix their hearts. Or die.

Happy fucking pride month to me.

~Sor
MOOP!

PostScript: The survey is open until June 20th. I'm not gonna obsessively refresh it because like...it turns out obsessing endlessly about gender is a hobby pretty much just for transphobes and the rest of us like movies and DnD and bellringing and actually going out dancing.

EDITED TO ADD @ 1644: Dear AccountabilityClub: I am not going to look at the Psychic Damage Queerphobia Spreadsheet (see #party-in-the-woods for context) until after my date with mek, and ideally not at all the rest of the night. I am going to commit to taking care of myself and being really aware of the fact that reading people saying horrible things about me and mine is bad for my brain, and I need to be prepared to do nice things to/with my brain to balance it.

(For those worried, we're at like 20% of responses disagreeing with "we should have genderneutral terms" and only a few of those have said actively nasty things. But it turns out a few bad apples can make the whole fruit salad taste like shit.)

Content Warnings go both ways. Transphobia above.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
(I think I did the backdating correct --I posted this to Facebook last Monday, 5/6. I'm crossposting it here, quite literally so I can link it to my therapist since Facebook is a stupid walled garden.)

I think I'm leaving dance early tonight, and I'm incredibly disappointed to be doing so.

Someone arrived without a mask. The person was standing out, not dancing. After about 20 minutes, I was able to grab the box of masks and offer it to them. The person vehemently refused. I finished the dance I was currently doing, about as dissociated as I ever get (sorry Janet, you deserve a partner who can pay attention to you) and walked out.

This is a person who is on the mailing list, who knows that we dance masks required on the first Monday. They said they were just there to drop something off. I'm frustrated that they couldn't figure out another compromise if they weren't willing to mask.

I'm disappointed that I won't feel safe doing Scottish Dance for another month now. We have a hobby that involves breathing heavily while very close to each other. I don't feel safe doing that hobby in mask-optional zones, with people who have made it clear that they are not considering covid caution in other realms of their lives.

So far I haven't had covid, which I feel very lucky for. Everything I've heard about it tells me it's deeply unpleasant. It can cause damage to your immune system, to your brain, to your heart. I don't want to get it and, if I'm unlucky enough to have it without realizing, I really really don't want to pass it on to anyone.

I appreciate that some of my other hobby spaces do include people who are mindful of the risks, and keep track of various metrics to collectively judge/decide when things are lower/higher risk and what precautions should be taken. I appreciate having a boss who offers to mask when meeting with me. I appreciate having family and lovers who communicate about when they've most recently tested, what risks they're taking.

And I miss feeling like I am a welcome or included part of the Scottish Country community.

(Updates include this post I made here originally and the fact that progress has maybe kinda sorta been made on the queer scottish thing I'm trying to do.)

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Today was a good day!

(We're gonna ignore the little voice in the back of my head that is being all "great, you've had a few good days in a row, now it's all gonna go to shit and tomorrow will be part of the h e l l z o n e again. No brain. Don't do that. It's okay to just be happy where we're at right now.)

Today was a good day, and I am pleased by it, and here are some of the things I got done:

*Went to bed late and woke up late, but did get eight hours slep, which is the general goal. Had time to muck about a bit before my class-times.

*During class times, I saw three students (woo!) and had enough time to clean off/organize my desk (I have not yet figured out how 2computers1desk works, but it'll sort out eventually). Then I had enough time to catch up on all my grading for my Algebra students. Yay progress!

*Went to the RSCDS@home lesson, had a splendid time! Was pleased enough with the teacher that I sent him a nice email after, which is hopefully charming and not irritating. Also, he finished with "let's do an auld lang syne all across the world, cross those arms now" and wow did I fucking _shatter_ at that. It's interesting what it is that catches me out and reminds me "everything is wrong and it hurts so much"

*After that I ate lunch and played some Animal Crossing for a bit.

*Office Hours did not have any students show up *but* I was again work-productive (whaaaaaat) and managed to do all the grading for my Data Analysis seniors *and* submit their grades for progress reports. Those aren't due until Friday, so this is _deeply_ unprecedented.

*I actually made it to bells tonight --I've missed the last two weeks for reasons largely related to "pandemics are hard on the brain". Bells is, as always, fucking weird, but I did a successful touch of Cambridge minor (a bob at every lead end) (immediately preceded by a mostly successful plain course, in which I fucked up enough at the beginning that my brain decided very firmly it was going to do The Thing. I am glad I kept pushing through and didn't quit bells tonight despite it, I did mostly level out.)

Also rang GrandsireTrips (which I didn't think I knew? I still don't know if I know it, but the ringingroom runs slowly enough that I can fake it) and StedmanTrips (from the tenors, yes both of them! I know that's only one brain's worth of stuff and it's not actually impressive, but I'm pleased). Also spent quite a bit of time pub-chatting with various people, most of whoms voices I am _so happy_ to hear.

*Post bells was dinner (mostly eaten while listening to pubchat) and then chilling out while Ez did some Animal Crossing, and then realizing "oh hey, now is an optimal time to _actually work on Melody_ and do some stuff! So I did the absolute briefest searching on "how to import external hard drive" (first impressions: this is gonna suck, probably almost as bad as installing, *but* there's a way to just brute force the damn thing involving "use a working mac and a USB key to transfer the critical stuff")

*And then I did a bit more work with downloading A Music Software! Smammy recommended I try Quod Libet and on first pass it seems to do many of the things I am looking for. For trial reasons, I have downloaded all of my bandcamp purchases (which apparently included buying Wonders twice, NO REGRETS). This means my current library is about 515 tracks, 33% of which is s00j.

(About 20% each of Kate Nyx and Homestuck, and then the remaining 25% is "etc". I've got a W/IFS album, some Vienna Teng, some AJA, one musical, and a couple random internet things I bought at some point along the way. I am still looking forward to having access to EVERYTHING again, but this will be a good start!)

*I have also declared unto myself that I will be hanging out in Discord only on Melody, if at all possible, and not on the work computer anymore. Critically, this gives me the option of potentially trying to make a work discord account.

*Also, the "play fewer dumb phone games" strat that Jenn and I worked out yesterday has been successful for a first pass today, although it doesn't _really_ count since I didn't have any department meetings. We'll see what tomorrow brings!

I'm happy. It's been a good few days and I am happy for that, and that is a good thing, and the hell zone will happen when it happens and that will be okay too. I hope all of you are doing as well as you can. You have my love.

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Spent close to an hour getting my AnimalCrossing house _really_ in order, and now it is way past my bedtime, but I do feel oddly like that was a productive work which made me happy. Also my house is _fucking baller_ honestly! I have all six rooms done up to some extent or another and there are books scattered everywhere and insecty things, and I made an actual kitchen, and my bedroom has a double-long bathtub because why the fuck not, and there's a playroom and the *fantastic* rave room downstairs (which looks so great with the lights and I desperately need to get every other colour of them!)

Also jesus, my classroom upstairs just makes me so overwhelmingly happy every time I look at it. I don't know how I'm possibly gonna cram more bookshelves in there once I need to put up more insect models!

And I've now put my chemistry set into what once was the insect room, and that room is just dirt and fire and chemistry and a small handful of bugs and I *really* like it!

Also, now nearly every room has good time walling and flooring going on! I'm gonna keep buying more of them (slightly addictive) but I am so pleased with *that* aspect of it all as well!

Yeah, I'm happy. It was a good day today!

***

Other things that were good:

*Finished all my lessons for the week, even though I didn't wanna. Must do a lot of grading this week to catch up, Ought to reach out to damn near all my students as well, just to try and check in before said grading.

*Had *seven* separate meetings today, jesus shit. Calculus (one student), Algebra (one student), NEST (the English-learner teacher team), Self-Care Meeting (with NEST), therapy (one therapist, one very rambly patient), Office Hours (one student), Secret SCDthing Planning Meeting. I was on zoom/gmeet for six fucking hours today, and that is too many. At least Tuesday is usually my worstday for this, and next week should be oh yeah...differently bad, since I've got queermeeting next Tuesday for like two hours between NEST and office hours. Sigh.

*Ezri fed me good foods and also I washed some dishes at some point, which is A Good.

*At therapy, Jenn and I worked out a potential strategy thing to help me with the instinct to play dumb phone games all the time. We will see if it works!

*Secret SCDthing Planning meeting went _much_ better than it could've and I am really excited and also I feel really good about having had an idea and having had time to work on the idea with other people and make the idea much better. Dear self: Other people are useful and helpful and you do not have to do everything alone. The "dumbass" at the end of that sentence is heavily implied.

Okay, I love you, bye bye!

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

Work:
*The usual!
*Honestly pretty triumphant for a Monday, without totally endless prepping or anything like that. Classes went well, flow of information good, yadda yadda.
*Green Club meeting was...small, but happened!

Body:
*Did a little bit of self-care and came home after school and rested real serious-like.
*Woke up for reals on second-alarm, which is pretty close
*Danced three dances, including a strathspey where I was really focusing on my footwork, which is always fun.
*Kept my wrist wrapped for much of the day, which helped(?) it? Wrapping in the ace bandage definitely didn't hurt anything!
*Obtained more meds from the pharmacy! Yayyyyy!

Social:
*Got to hang with jere7my and talk art and generally be silly together on the ride in to dance.
*At dance, spent some nice time sitting and chatting with Clara while she did some PT on her feet. Later we danced together, yay!
*Also got to dance with Neil McBadmotherfucker (as he is still designated in my phone), which is just..splendid! He hasn't shown up in a Right Age, and it's really lovely to see him around again.
*Lovely new guy from last week did not show up, but I did get to dance with a nice new guy this week who has reels down very very well and claims to have no other dance experience. His name is Ye, and I did not catch how he came to Scottish (mysTEERious)

Personal:
*Pushed through and did the emails
*Pushed through and am finishing words
*Came to an Important Conclusion regarding my future, and can now start moving forward with the rest of my life.

Wheee! Hope your Monday was nice and you are well rested for the week ahead!

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Accomplishments:

Work:
*Roughed out the rubric for my Data Analysis students' final project.

Bells:
*Did not make a QP, but at least that was a whole-band thing and not just a me thing
*Did get to ring treble to just *bunches* of different stuff, that was a lot of fun!

Social:
*After bells, we all headed over to Dale and Emily's new house for their housewarming! Their house is SO GOOD! It is full of twisty passages and closets and easy to get lost in and it was totally great.
*Played with small children a ton, which is A+
*Also chatted with adults I like a ton, which is also A+
*Then I went to my dance-mom's surprise 60th birthday, which was a roaring success!

Dance:
*Got to do some spontaneous random contact-improv with Harsh, who I described to a mutual friend as "yeah, we just have very compatible body-grooves" or something like that. I think it's a good way of saying it --there wasn't even any music, but the two of us have very cooperative dance brains which makes it a ton of fun to dance with him.
*Got to dance Tuchas Long Enough, which is the objectively best dance I've ever helped write (sorry Pinewoods Eel).
*Called the Scottish Country Dances for a room full of mixed modern-English-International-etc dancers. They went really well! My sheer force of will for teaching beginners continues to serve me well.

Personal:
*There are no good accomplishments here. But such is life, alas!
*(I did write my words)
*(I did then write an accomplishments post)
*(I will try to do some email, and certainly do it tomorrow if not).

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Just a picture of my eye (Me-Eye)
Are you interested in learning Scottish dancing? Here are some things you might want to know about!

Thing the one: I will be teaching the fundamentals class at the Cambridge Class (in Watertown) for March! No experience whatsoever required, come to the Canadian American Club in Watertown on Monday nights and do some Scottish Country Dancing! Stretching/warm-ups at 7:45, class at 8:00, social dance for all at 9:15! $9 or $5 students, but if that's a hardship let me know and I will see about finding you a sponsor. I would be tres happy to see some of my friends there (and will try to remember and give a better reminder when it is actually March).

Thing the two: I, and many other people, will be teaching our practice lessons for the candidate class. We need practice teaching, you need learning, again any experience level welcome! This is going to be intermittent Saturdays throughout the spring, mostly in Salem MA. The first one is March 9th from 1-5PM, at 211 Bridge Street. All are totally free.

The Royal Scottish Country Dance Society is quite serious about its teacher certifications, and part of the requirements are a certain number of hours spent practicing throughout the year. Practicing with live bodies is much better than teaching to a mostly empty room, and it'll be a great chance for beginner dancers to get exposed to a multitude of different teaching styles and for all dancers to have a chance to work on their fundamentals and really break things down.

Happy to explain more as necessary, and hope to see you all dancing!

~Sor
MOOP!
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Last night I went to squares for the first time in...over a semester. It was nice! I danced in the hack tips, and I got to Rounds dance with a couple people, and I led a Grand March that was a little unpolished but probably not awful. I have a new working theory (determined with the help of my therapist) that it's really hard to fuck up a Grand March so badly that it Cannot Be Saved, and it was nice to (unintentionally, I promise!) see that in action.

I continue to never have friends or time for friends and/or friendship, but I think this counts as two unusual social things I've done in a week (hanging with bellsfolks doesn't count --it's definitely appreciated and good for me, but doesn't count as unusual anymore) which is a hugely good track record. I think my ongoing mood will maybe reflect that? I don't know, I've been in a really dark place the last two or three days(weeks), and it's not fun.

(On Saturday I went to the strip dreidl party and had a pretty nice time. People liked the clever joke I wrote on my tits1 and there were many good latkes to eat and it was nice to have chattytimes, even if it was mostly not with anyone I know really well or feel super intimate towards.)

There's a party this weekend that I haven't RSVPd to and haven't definitely decided to go to, but I think I would like to go to. And there's a _lot_ of bells stuff --four quarter peals on Saturday (I'm tenoring for one of them) and tower cleaning on Sunday. I need to do a little more Christmas shopping (I still don't have anything really good for mom, but then again, she hasn't sent out a list HINT HINT) this weekend too, but I think that'll be sorta in and around bells stuff.

And that's where I'm at. My brain is really painfully not good right now, but I'm hiding it by lots of enjoying(?) and being good at(??) my job. Tonight is laundry and grading, and tomorrow and Friday are FRANTIC PREPARATION OF THE EVIDENCE FILE, but at least I don't have my Unit Four lessons hanging over my head anymore2

I hope you are well! I would like to see you, but I'm probably not willing to make/commit to specific plans until the new year at this point (unless you're wabbit and live near Dallas and would be willing to hang between the 23rd and 1st)

~Sor
MOOP!

1: "It's okay Tumblr --I'm not female and neither are these!" and then I had arrows pointing at my nip nops. I am Very Good at humour or something.

2: Except insomuch as I'm not sure if I count for having submitted them on time or not. I submitted them on Dec7 around 5PM my time, they need to be in "six months before the Unit 5 test" which is June 8th. Of course, 5PM my time is like 10PM Scotland, and then they weren't in the office on Saturday and Sunday so I had an email bright and early on Monday telling me my Unit Four stuff was received...but does that mean it was in time? No one knows!

I told my therapist straight up that if Scotland decides to be that petty with me, then I will go ahead and flex my power until they burn.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Scheduled Goals for today:

*Eat breakfast, brush teeth and hair, read my comics, the usual morning stuff.

*Round about 11ish, head over to Laura's to work on our teaching schedule and dance programs for the next two months at SCD Cambridge Class (Come dance with us!).

*Get to the Harvard Bridge ideally around 1ish, but defnitely before 2 in order to watch the MIT Moving Day Charles Crossing Competition, which sounds like it's going to be super entertaining. Also to potentially hang out with Eric, who is my work bestie's bff and a generally good dude. He does not have a value label1 yet.

*In the late afternoon to evening, go hang out with my sir for a date because we haven't had one in weeks and weeks and I need company right now.

*Ignore every one of the eighty-seven party invites I've gotten (what the hell this weekend?) because again, date with sir. Who is my best friend. And who I haven't gotten good snuggle time in forever. Which I really really fucking need.

Unscheduled Goals for today/this weekend:

*Wash my hair, oh gods, it needs it so bad.

*Maybe go to REI and run REI errands like obtaining rain pants and more/better panniers?

*Yesterday I went through Schoolspring and found 8(ish) job postings that sound like they wouldn't completely suck, now I need to actually apply for all of them. My depressed goal is to see if I can get to 40 applications before I hear back from any of them, my realistic goal is to average one application per week until I get hired or take up substituting again.

Yeah, I'm gonna be really kinda dark about this for a while. I'm feeling rejected and inadequate, and like I'm not actually good enough for my chosen career field. I loved my workplace, I loved so much about it and I feel heartbroken that they don't want me to stay.

*Grade the last class worth of tests I have. Prep for Monday. Outline the week/week-half courselet I promised my 11th graders about necessary math for the real world. Remember that just because I'm not coming back is no excuse to either burn this professional bridge or deny my girls a good education.

*I'd say clean my room, but this is another weekend where I'm going to be staying largely out of the house, and so that's really just not happening. I will try and build in some tiny, inadequate, 20/10s over the coming week, but of course that's not going to happen.

Good plan, self.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: See, in high school there was Light Eric and Dark Eric, and it would've just ended there and not been a funny joke if I hadn't gone away to Boston and met an Eric who was *already* labeled as Darker! Like, I didn't even have to assign it to him! So this Eric needs to be put onto the lightness spectrum somewhere.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Heyo! It's about that time again, have some resolution updates:

750words:
85 days. That is beginning to turn into real numbers. I am beginning to actually worry about what variety of stupid I'm gonna do involving Pinewoods. Like, there is a little internet booth at Pinewoods I could upload from, if I wrote the words earlier or later. That would totally work. That would totally not be an incredibly stupid plan. I have lots of free time at Pinewoods to write!

Music:
Sparr bought me the two s00j albums I'd been eyeing, and so now I have four/five1 of them, and yay. Sometimes I listen to other music too! I can probably stop updating this one, I think it's done.

Biking:
BIKING.
I have a bike again. I have a bike that runs again. It is amazing. Tyrian is the best. Also I got something like three flats in six days, I am not even kidding and that was super bullshit. But I think she's better now.

Candidate Class:
My exams were on Saturday. People keep asking me how I think I did, and I just...I really don't have an idea. I can't let myself have an idea, because I'm already more anxious about these than I've been about anything in the last ten years and thinking in depth about whether I missed important things will make me _actively crazy_. I should know my results in six to eight weeks, or possibly as soon as the end of this week.

There are a lot of combinations marked "failure" in my mind, and only two marked "success"2.

Pinewoods:
I am accepted to ESC, Scottish 1, and Scottish 2. I may be running a bug-themed party at ESCape, and I am super excited about that. It'll be really good!

Highland:
Seann Triubhas is only slightly easier to dance than it is to spell. >:|

Being awesome/mental health:
I have been an anxietyball the last week/month. It's very exciting. I am so sorry to anyone who has to deal with me, since anxietyKat seems identical to regularKat except I no longer smile as easily and the words that fall out of my mouth have a tendency to border on the _very_ dark.

But you know, I'm fine. Nothing going on is even a little bit worth killing myself over, and if it's not that bad, it ain't nothing in the long run.

Ambidancetrous:
I have made posts! I have made posts about the exam and posts about dances we wrote! I am hopefully going to make more posts, maybe about writing a grand march!

Making money:
I am the Bananager, I belong to the Bananamines, and also I'm pretty perpetually broke so if you have stuff I can do in the afternoons or evenings in exchange for your dollarbucks, I'm kinda intrigued.

Social:
Well, NEFFA didn't suck. Other than that, it's a real good thing I adore my fellow candidates, because I have seen NO ONE ELSE.

Dentist:
So, my dentist was all like "you need a crown" and I was all like "I KNOW, RIGHT!?"
So now I have a temporary crown and the real one will appear sometime in early June, probably.

***

No progress:
Dante editing
Paper sorting --I have, in fact, made negative progress by taking things out of my filing cabinet
Room
Grad School
Pushups
Dancing --I mean, I've been doing a ton, just not outside of Greater Camberville and also Stow yet.
Stiltsing --I was not allowed to make stilts before taking my exams.
ADHD management --no, and my executive functioning has been completely shot
Morrowind
Social Justice
Inbox 0
Activity vs Passivity online
Tracking media

Whee!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Susan dG sent me Sirens, I just bought Stolen Season when it came out, and Sparr sent me Tangles and Haphazard as CDs. So I have four. HOWEVER, at Balticon 2012, s00j sold out of Mischief and I managed to unfold my tongue long enough to be all "can I just hand you money right now and then get my friend to email me a zip file is that okay?" and she was like "sure, sounds great and very convenient!" So I have Mischief, legally, as a digital copy. (I will probably buy a physical copy when I get a chance both because I'm a completist and because it's actually my favourite, apparently)

2: Success 1: All five candidates pass their unit 2 and their unit 3. Success 2: All five candidates except me pass their unit 2 and their unit 3. Failure: Any other candidate fails either of their tests, because damnit, this is so important to all of us and yet I'm really the one for whom it matters least, Cambridge _has_ teachers.
sorcyress: Just a picture of my eye (Me-Eye)
I don't seem to have ever actually written this story down before, although I tell abridged versions of it relatively often. So here, have the explanation of how I started Scottish Country Dance.

My first semester of college (fall 2007) was a pretty great time. I was making new friends, reconnecting with old ones, and spending a lot of time just wandering around and exploring the world. You don't know what freedom is until you've moved six hundred miles away from home.

One of the people I was spending a fair amount of time with was my friend MagusMarc. He and I had met about three years prior, at Origins, chatted online for a while, lost track of each other, and remet at Balticon '06. From there, we were talking regularly and became pretty good online friends. When I moved to Boston, it turned out that he lived just about a mile away from Lesley. He was my only local geeky friend, and one of my only adult friends, and in general a nice alternative for when the college kids got too immature or mainstream for me.

As it got towards Thanksgiving, my computer was starting to act up a little bit. I assumed nothing too bad was going on, and when Mr Belm picked me up (I stayed the night after Thanksgiving at his place) he offered to run some computerwizardy on Seren1 for me. The computer proved to be more a challenge than he could endure, and so I left it with him on Sunday --he let me borrow his clamshell2 so I'd have a computer for school, and agreed to take Seren off to the mac store.

On Monday, I was out and about with some college friends, when I received the phone call from Dave. Seren's hard drive had self-destructed There was no chance of getting _anything_ off it, and the drive would just have to be replaced.

I was devastated.

I had gotten the laptop at the end of August. I'd been using it exclusively for three straight months, and everything, everything, was gone. All my photos, all my bookmarks, all my college work, all my writing, and most importantly, Behind the Walls version 2.0. My diary.

Since we were in the area, I politely excused myself from Dominik and the twins. I walked to Marc's house, and knocked on the door. "Distract me?" I whimpered, recalling other times when he'd been good enough to give me comfort.

"Well, I'm going dancing soon." he replied, and that made perfect sense to me. I went along with him, to Scottish Country Dance, and had a good enough time of things (despite having the worst possible shoes). And that might have been it. Except.

On Wednesday or so, I got my computer back with a shiny new hard drive, and a surprise external drive (early Christmas gift). I named her Vera Serenfreude, based on Dan and Tho's suggestions. She is a wonderful wonderful beast, and even if she's getting old and cranky, thank god she's managed to get old.

The following weekend, I went home to Maryland. There were several goals for this visit --surprise mom, surprise Veronica, go see Rocky Horror and the LRHS play3. There was also one major thing that happened that hadn't been planned --I broke up with kSatyr, who I had been dating for about ten months at the time.

From noon Sautrday to noon Sunday I spent equal numbers of hours crying and sleeping.

I believe the actual number is something like "three"

BtW 2.1, 2December2007

So Monday I was back in town4. and I again show up at Marc's. I tell him what had happened, and I ask. "Distract me?"

From then, it was a tradition. I danced three weeks of December, went home on break, and came back and danced every week after. I kept dancing even after Marc stopped being able to make it, even after he moved away. I've dragged as many friends as I could (and Tricia and Jesse both _stayed_, at least for a little while!) and don't intend to stop. Due to Scottish, I've found two partners, gone to one con, and eaten slices from *way* too many cakes.

It's been four years now. It's one of the things I enjoy most in the world. And while I hate that the impetus had to be a tragedy, because those tragedies led me to dancing, they were absolutely worth it, every bit5.

Cheers.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: "Don't you mean Vera?" Keep reading.

2: one of these. I still want one _so bad_. Such a comfortable laptop!

3: Unfortunately the only one I made after I had graduated LRHS. I feel bad about that.

4: And my arrival back in Boston is a different strong memory --the first time my heart ever sang out that I was Home.

5: There are parts of the story that I never tell, but that you might know anyways. SCD, and everything and everyone I've gotten from it? Yeah. Yeah, they're worth that too. Every. Single. Fucking. Bit.


(Apologies to anyone who saw this twice --it didn't want to crosspost)
sorcyress: Just a picture of my eye (Me-Eye)
I don't seem to have ever actually written this story down before, although I tell abridged versions of it relatively often. So here, have the explanation of how I started Scottish Country Dance.

My first semester of college (fall 2007) was a pretty great time. I was making new friends, reconnecting with old ones, and spending a lot of time just wandering around and exploring the world. You don't know what freedom is until you've moved six hundred miles away from home.

One of the people I was spending a fair amount of time with was my friend MagusMarc. He and I had met about three years prior, at Origins, chatted online for a while, lost track of each other, and remet at Balticon '06. From there, we were talking regularly and became pretty good online friends. When I moved to Boston, it turned out that he lived just about a mile away from Lesley. He was my only local geeky friend, and one of my only adult friends, and in general a nice alternative for when the college kids got too immature or mainstream for me.

As it got towards Thanksgiving, my computer was starting to act up a little bit. I assumed nothing too bad was going on, and when Mr Belm picked me up (I stayed the night after Thanksgiving at his place) he offered to run some computerwizardy on Seren1 for me. The computer proved to be more a challenge than he could endure, and so I left it with him on Sunday --he let me borrow his clamshell2 so I'd have a computer for school, and agreed to take Vera off to the mac store.

On Monday, I was out and about with some college friends, when I received the phone call from Dave. Seren's hard drive had self-destructed There was no chance of getting _anything_ off it, and the drive would just have to be replaced.

I was devastated.

I had gotten the laptop at the end of August. I'd been using it exclusively for three straight months, and everything, everything, was gone. All my photos, all my bookmarks, all my college work, all my writing, and most importantly, Behind the Walls version 2.0. My diary.

Since we were in the area, I politely excused myself from Dominik and the twins. I walked to Marc's house, and knocked on the door. "Distract me?" I whimpered, recalling other times when he'd been good enough to give me comfort.

"Well, I'm going dancing soon." he replied, and that made perfect sense to me. I went along with him, to Scottish Country Dance, and had a good enough time of things (despite having the worst possible shoes). And that might have been it. Except.

On Wednesday or so, I got my computer back with a shiny new hard drive, and a surprise external drive (early Christmas gift). I named her Vera Serenfreude, based on Dan and Tho's suggestions. She is a wonderful wonderful beast, and even if she's getting old and cranky, thank god she's managed to get old.

The following weekend, I went home to Maryland. There were several goals for this visit --surprise mom, surprise Veronica, go see Rocky Horror and the LRHS play3. There was also one major thing that happened that hadn't been planned --I broke up with kSatyr, who I had been dating for about ten months at the time.

From noon Sautrday to noon Sunday I spent equal numbers of hours crying and sleeping.

I believe the actual number is something like "three"

BtW 2.1, 2December2007

So Monday I was back in town4. and I again show up at Marc's. I tell him what had happened, and I ask. "Distract me?"

From then, it was a tradition. I danced three weeks of December, went home on break, and came back and danced every week after. I kept dancing even after Marc stopped being able to make it, even after he moved away. I've dragged as many friends as I could (and Tricia and Jesse both _stayed_, at least for a little while!) and don't intend to stop. Due to Scottish, I've found two partners, gone to one con, and eaten slices from *way* too many cakes.

It's been four years now. It's one of the things I enjoy most in the world. And while I hate that the impetus had to be a tragedy, because those tragedies led me to dancing, they were absolutely worth it, every bit5.

Cheers.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: "Don't you mean Vera?" Keep reading.

2: one of these. I still want one _so bad_. Such a comfortable laptop!

3: Unfortunately the only one I made after I had graduated LRHS. I feel bad about that.

4: And my arrival back in Boston is a different strong memory --the first time my heart ever sang out that I was Home.

5: There are parts of the story that I never tell, but that you might know anyways. SCD, and everything and everyone I've gotten from it? Yeah. Yeah, they're worth that too. Every. Single. Fucking. Bit.


(Apologies to anyone who saw this twice --I had to repost due to crossposting issues)

Schedule!

May. 31st, 2011 11:45 am
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
This will be moved to Top-post in the near future, and remain there until the end of May. It was last updated on 2011-04-19 1028

WEEKLY
Monday: Internship from 0730-1430, SCD from 1930-2300
Tuesday: Internship from 0730-1430, Class from 1430-1800, possibly Diesel, Squares from 1930-2300
Wednesday: Internship from 0730-1430, Class from 1600-1830
Thursday: Internship from 0730-1430, Class from 1600-1830
Friday: Ind.Study from 1245-1400, Class from 1430-1600
Saturday: Off unless specified below
Sunday: Off unless specified below

"Private" is used to denote something that I have been invited to, but do not know if it is open-invitation, so you probably can't come with me.

"Mine, things" means that you can ask for further detail as to what exactly I'm up to that night, but I don't at all have to tell you.

JANUARY
27-28: Mine, things

FEBRUARY
03: Dinner at JoshZed's
06: Private party -- Empanadas, 2000-2300
07: Tentative date
10: Date!
18-20: No Such Convention1 at Vassar
25: Mine, things
26: Private party -- Hot Foods

MARCH
4-6: Complicated spring break things possibly to include Veronica in Boston
7-10: Complicated spring break things possibly to include being in Maryland or Chicago
11-13: Complicated spring break things possibly to include Shan in Boston
17: Mine, things
18: Mine, things
18-20: Vericon
25: Spark in the Dark contra at the Masonic Temple across from Porter Square
26: Lesley stuffnthings
27: Goin' to the museum with jere7my

APRIL
1: Mine, things, bikes!
2: Private Party -- Dog's birthday!
8-10: Hanging with Matt, then Mine, things of varying sorts
13: Cupcake Camp: Excuse for cupcake makers to hang out in a building. Free to the public. Probably delicious!
15-17: NEFFA dance festival
20: Mine, things
21-26: Mine, things, Atlanta
29: Gotta give me that, oo, shlock treatment... (Shlock Therapy night at j7y's.)

MAY
7: Free Comic Book Day (wanna wander the city with me?), Highland Ball
8: Mine, things until mid-day, then might try to get to Steampunk City
13: Mine, things in the evening
14: MTEL --all day standardized test for teachers
16-20: Senior week during the day, Mine, things during the night. Also, packing.
21: Commencement? *crosses fingers and hopes*
27-30: Balticon

All is subject to change and update, I'm probably forgetting many important things, please feel free to remind me of them.

I'm gonna get a job, because I want a place to live, which is going to destroy the hell out of this schedule. But that's okay, we can live with that.

And did you know that "Veronica" and "Vericon" are _practically_ anagrams? Also, if I'm going to go to Vericon, I really must work on the appropriate cosplay. Sunshine, ho!

1: Dude, NonCon is _such_ a terrible name for it. But I've been wanting to go since, oh, 2005.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Today is Wednesday.

Tonight is Wednesday night. My nefarious plans for tonight involve visiting [livejournal.com profile] jere7my and getting one last round of bad movies in before I go home for the summer.

Tomorrow is Thursday. I will spend the day doing things, at least one of which I hope to be studying for my Italian final. I will spend the night doing contra over at the Concord Scout House --come say goodbye!

The day after that is Friday. I have a final from ten to noon, and then will hopefully spend much of the rest of the day packing.

Saturday, no finals, more packing. Saturday afternoon and evening I am going over to the Belmhouse to babysit and hang out. Eventually I will detangle from there, go back on campus, and collect all members of the Lesley University Chaos Club who want to go see Rocky Horror.

Get home at late o clock, go sleep somewhere. Sunday morning, collect people to go get "breakfast" (ideally at noon or one) at Mr. Crepes. Steal Ria and/or Maddie on secret missions that I may or may not have alluded to last post.

After secret mission, study for maths. Pack more.

Monday, take maths final. Pack. Pack a lot. Pack like an *absolutely* crazy person, and as stressedly as I can possibly manage. Hopefully finish packing before it's time for dance.

Monday night, go dancing at Springstep for the last time for four months. Try not to think about it too hard, as it might make me cry. Dance with dance-Andrea, since I promised her a dance, dance with...other people. Get in a Last Waltz1 with Magus that'll have to last me most of a summer. Hopefully stop being such a gloomcookie all the time.

Tuesday morning, go to my Teacherfinal, which consists of "showing up". (Or, you know, have flu like symptoms and stay home in order to better achieve the rest of the day.) Say goodbye to Evan, and school-Andrea and Erin and whoever else is around. Go back to Dock 18, say goodbye to the roomies. Cry, because, well, it's *me*.

Give mom a hug and toss things into Catbus2. Stop by Belmhouse, thank them roughly a million times for letting me leave things there over the summer. Drive to Maryland.

Arrive in Maryland. Give Shan a noogie and Alys a hug. Curl up in my own bed, in my own room, with a door that closes. Try very very hard not to think about how long four months is, really.

Wednesday.

Visit Veronica. See if I still have a job. Be back in Maryland.

Sigh.

((And I mean there's good in there -Balticon, Tho, Origins, Day Camp, visiting mek, Otakon, Oella --not to mention all the Maryland people I love and adore. But seriously. Sigh.))

~Sor
MOOP!

1: There's symbolism to the Last Waltz, youknow? No, not always or anything, but your traditional Last Waltz, you do it with your sweetie (well, one of them. We're ignoring the polydrama for the purposes of this). Out of all of dancing, that's the one that really matters --a good partner, and the world becomes Just Right.

I wonder who my final waltz was with at NEFFA last year. I know for this year, and while I had a last waltz at Dance Flurry, the role of the Last Waltz was filled by the Penultimate Waltz.

Andumyeah. Stuff. LOOK A DISTRACTION, BYE!

2: Mom's van. Galileo was the old one, and we haven't changed plates, but the minivan I do most of my driving in is called Catbus.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
So, as some of you may know, Sorcy has a huge fascination with polyphasic sleep patterns, to the point where one of my 101 in 1001 goals is to spend a solid two months sometime in devoted non-monophasic sleep.

I've just thought of one interesting problem with sleeping at weird times: when do you get in your basic hygeine? This thought started just with when do you change your clothes, and spread to include things like showers and brushing teeth, etc.

Me and my fucked up monophasicish lifestyle make it a point to go through at least one full change of clothing in every twenty four hour period. Unlike virtually everyone I know, however, unless I'm dressing up for something, I usually tend to do this changing more in the evening, before hanging out with people. This came out of the fact that I pretty much sleep in whatever t-shirt and panties I was wearing the night before, and have no qualms about pulling on the same pair of jeans two or three days in a row. This means I ocassionally tend to get lazy, and just pull on jeans and throw on a bra when I wake up, especially if I'm running late and don't want to have to analyze an outfit1

Eventually, I will realize I'm wearing the same clothes I wore all yesterday, and then I will feel all gross and go take a shower and put on something clean. Of course, by that point, I'm not doing anything active and not really 'wearing' out my clothes, and so I just sleep in them and wear them the next day. Repeat.

(You must remember also, the Sorcy is -at the moment- almost nocternal. I have not fallen asleep before midnight in a heinously long time, and, when given the option, most days I wake up around noon or one. Next year and my four 9:30 AM mornings a week will change that, but for now, I like it. Butyeah, considering I don't even get up until the afternoon, I'm really not wearing out my clothes that fast anyways.)

Unrelatedly, I forget how much I adore mornings, because I never really see them. And by morning, I of course mean sunrise until about nine o clock --everything is so calm and peaceful and serene. It makes me feel at ease with myself.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Contrary to popular belief, I do not really just roll into my closet and wear whatever sticks. (Unless I'm running HEINOUSLY late) I actually put a painful amount of analyzing into what I wind up wearing, most of it really really stupid. While I can and do get away with the jeans and a t-shirt look on a daily basis, I tend to be picky as to what t-shirt I want to wear (I don't want to wear any of these! Where are my fen shirts, damnation?!).

This problem increases astronomically the second I have to dress up for anything. Hell, even going to SCD causes me to rummage through my wardrobe in a frenzied sort of manner, looking desperately for a 'good' (ladies cut, usually) t-shirt that'll not look too egregious with whichever skirt I'm going to wear. But when it gets to semiformal things, like classroom observations, where you want to look professional and adult, but not fancy? Oh jesus christ, I go into full blown panic mode.

In short....go see all of Jannyblue's rants on fashion. Mine tend to be pretty much exactly the same. Yep.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Good Stuff:

*I e-mailed Blue Canary (my ex-girlfriend) on a whim a couple days ago, and she replied in a nice long e-mail chock full of her usual brand of twisted silliness.

*It's free comic book day!

*It's also, apparently, Naked Gardening Day!

*The latter of those was told to me by Magus randomly calling and being all "Guess what today is!". Or, in short, I really like having impulsive friends.

*I wound up being dragged to the welcome dance last night for the highland ball that's happening this weekend. It was pretty much just a whole lot of SCD, which was awesome. Alsoalso, we ended off with Australian Ladies, which is still probably my favourite dance ever. (Although whatever it was we were doing on Monday that had the dolphin reels was kinda awesome --dolphin reels rock. Not as much as allemandes do, but still, a lot.)

*Alsoalso, BDan was there last night, which was cool, especially because BDan has the best birth name of absolutely anyone I know. Unrelatedly, at said dancing, there were exactly six people in pants. That's less than a set (usually) Gleehehehe! *bounce!*

(For reference, there were generally seven or eight four couple sets going at a time, and a fairly even male/female balance. Sorcy loves kilts, yes she does.)

*MST3K tonight!

*Good lord, you lot annhilated my lyrics meme. Or rather, you almost annhilated it --I expect once Tho finally gets around to it, two of the last three will suddenly and magically be guessed. As for the last one...go see the last badstuff thing.

*************

Bad Stuff:

*Finals

*Packing

*I left my coat at the danceplace last night, hurr.

*I still have a cold, make it *stop*

*All you people who got the rent lyrics right off the bat? Go listen to "tick, tick...BOOM!" It's awesome, by the same guy, and sounds a bit like Rent. Also, has the song 30/90, which is one of my current favourites.

ALLFORNOW!

~Sor
MOOP!

Original Tags: grammarfail
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
So yeah. Dancing: good. Being able to sleep in: good. Remembering to take my meds like a good girl: good. Getting enough to eat last night, honesty, kitties: good, good, good.

Sorcy feeling less emo? Fan*tas*tic. [/Ecclston1!Who]

***

Dancing babbling, this cut is only an expiriment )

***

Hey, wanna know what's decidedly uncool? Rehersal nights are Mondays (SCD), Wednesdays (Meaning I'm in class from one until five fifteen, and then in rehersal from six until ten, hatehate), and Thursdays (Game night at Dan4th's.)

Also, Sunday mornings (meaning I can't stay over at anyones house on Saturday nights) and tech on Saturday mornings (meaning I can't stay over at anyones house on Friday nights.) Mantra to be repeated until the thirteenth of April: I really do love the theatre. I really do love the theatre. I really do love the theatre.

Unrelatedly, NTS, I need to look up when/where/how much NEFFA is. Oh, hot damn, they have the whole "volunteer and get in free" thing going. Sorcy likes, yep.

***

Right! I'm going to...uhm...accomplish things? Like what, there's nothing *to* accomplish today. Well, I could go clean my room. Eh, maybe. AT ANY RATE!

*waves and runs off*

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Have I mentioned yet that it took me until I actually *listened* to the lyrics of Science Fiction / Double Feature again to get Claude (from Heroes)'s name? Yeah, I am just that ditzy.

2: Turning waltz --Viennese style, I think?

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