MOOP!

It's landing on a weekend this year, and it makes sense to do it tonight, so here we go, I'm doing a proper solstice.

(That means not sleeping until the sun returns. Ideally also having a candle burning while I do --giving the sun a beacon to look for!)

My day had bells and then hanging out with Tuesday for the afternoon, since ke was briefly in town. When ker parents came to pick kem up, we had a lovely 15-20 minutes chatting at and about my bookshelf. It felt very good, to get that kind of approval (even if it's not something I would need).

In the evening, after I fed the cat, I slunk around the block to verdantry's house for their and Greg's solstice party. It was small and cozy and chill. I drank mulled cider, and ate plum pudding, and had a really lovely quiet time laughing and joking and enjoying listening to the inside-baseball talk of SCD adventures. Sometimes when it's not your circus it's really enjoyable to just watch the monkeys!

Around midnight, Greg gave, in essence, a toast. It boiled down to "Community Is Good", my political stance these past some years. Community _is_ good. People are the thing that make all the rest of this worthwhile.

I hope you have people to hold you up until the sun returns. I love you! <3

~Sor
MOOP!

I survived MCing a party!

My program was a little too hard, which was partially my fault for being...challenging, and partly my fault for not being totally up on what dances are actually currently in the Cambridge Class repertoire. I thought Bampton Strathspey was going to be an easier one, sorry y'all!

But I got several compliments from various people, and I genuinely think I did a very good job briefing. I made a couple of stumbles, but I think I redeemed myself out of them nicely, and I think I was quite clear overall. I'm happy about it! Next priority: well, okay, figure out what I'm teaching on Thursday for my class, and THEN my next priority is writing my Pinewoods program. Which is due on the 22nd, so gotta get on it, yipes!

The past weekend with SamSam was lovely! We had mostly very lazy days (which is to say, huddling inside and avoiding the cold) but also walked four miles round trip in the softly falling snow to visit Gather Here. Did you know there's a big lovely (kinda bougie) crafts store in Inman Square? It had so much beautiful fabric! It was nice to be able to show off cool things about my city to Sam, and also to discover them for myself.

Work today was...a lot. I mostly managed to do the things? Which is good --it's like, the first day since September where I actually had all my lessons prepped before I left the building. And I did a little grading. And I am very very tired and all the students are both tired and off the wall and we have five and a half more school days to get through before I can just get on a train and gooooo.

Of course, getting on a train and gooooing will be made more complicated by the fact that there is exactly one weekend left before chrimbo, so if I'm gonna manage to go shopping for any presents, I need to do it like _now_. Maybe it would be nice to buy my mother a chrimbo present? I think they would enjoy that??

(note to self, actually go to bells at least once this weekend so you can a) return your BPL library books and b) go to Q's nuts in the Boston Public Market and buy a bunch of those for stocking stuffers).

Dunno what else there is to say. [CW: gun violence] I am fucking livid at the parts of the universe that are contrasting my lovely weekend at home with, like, multiple major shooting incidents. Can we fucking not? (says only country where this regularly happens). [/CW]

hope you have love and wholeness in your heart and that you are taking care of everyone you meet as much as you can handle doing so.

~Sor
MOOP!

Okay, well, it's not _done_ but my room is a damn sight _better_ and that's pretty cool.

And by "damn sight better" I actually mean "I got rid of two of the boxen that've just been sitting around taking up space all over my room since I moved in in 2020". Which is...fantastic. I'm not remotely done cleaning, either up or out, but progress is happening! That's quite grand! Someday maybe I will have everything tucked away in a place it belongs, having gotten rid of all the things that shouldn't actually be in here. What a good fantasy.

(I am being sharp and salty to cover up the fact that I am actually quite happy to have regained a little bit of space, and irritated at how long it takes me sometimes.)

I am nowhere near finished, of course. My desk is the biggest disaster area (although I've definitely made progress on it, we're like, eight inches deep of shit instead of sixteen). And there's an endless number of papers that want sorting, but that's like, a longterm plan. Not something I expect to get done anytime soon, not even if I'm procrastinating on my grading real good!

That being said, I had a point somewhere in the span of time I've lived in this room where I was trying to sort papers for about twenty minutes a day. Do that for two months and I'd have everything done, I expect. Just....you know. Consistency is hard.

The surface reason I am cleaning is that SamSam is visiting this weekend, but the real weekend is that having my room be a catastrophe is a pretty strong Blues Clue¹, and also _definitely_ one of the ones that chickeneggs² me. So, having latched onto the slight mania of "you have no idea how badly I do not want to do my grading" means actually trying to get my roomspace tolerable?

We're through the long dark November. I made a note in my calendar for November first, next year and all subsequents, telling me that my brain's about to turn into shit and I might want to do something about it. What should I do? No one knows the answer to that.

I mucked with my phone so that it goes into "focus mode" for two hours each afternoon. No games, no internet. Chat is okay, because I almost never am _mindless_ and stuck about chat. So far I haven't broken it, which means that it ~cannot be broken~. Unlike, say, the timers on my various phone games that theoretically say I can only play like 15 minutes unless I go make it longer which is very easy to do. Sigh.

And I'm trying to crawl myself out of the work hellhole --the above is theoretically helpful for this. Man though, I'm looking forward to it being solstice real bad. Arise fair sun, and slay the envious moon³

I hope you are finding the ability to do the things that bring you comfort and joy. I love you!

~Sor
MOOP!

<sup>1: "what idiot called them depression symptoms instead of..."

2: Did you know that you can just say things? It's ridiculous that language works in any capacity whatsoever! I say so much entirely impenetrable nonsense, and yes, lots of the time it's partly that I'm quoting things, but sometimes it's that, like, I'm just making up weird things that maybe only make sense to me.

So, instead of finding the term "negative feedback loop" my brain decided to hand me "chickenegg", as in "which came first". Am I depressed because my room is a catastrophe or is my room a catastrophe because yadda yadda

3: Case in point, this is a reference! It's a Kate Nyx song lyric.</sup>

Trigger Warning: Sexual and emotional abuse.

I don't know that milk is supposed to be a thing you put on your altar --probably it's not a great choice, what with the fact that it spoils and stuff.

But it's eighteen years tonight and tomorrow, and I wasn't gonna _not_. I'll clean it up tomorrow. The room can live with milk in it for twelve hours.

I think I get ice cream tomorrow. I don't know what else my plans are, but I think ice cream is an absolutely pivotal part of it. Drink the thing that poisons those who would hurt you. Be stronger than they are. Have a thing that brings you joy that will keep them away, keep them from being able to touch you.

Eighteen years ago was the last time I was raped. I have now lived half my life in "after". Well. Tomorrow morning. Tonight and then. Approaching midnight means still at the Hoff theatre. I think the part where he tried to fuck me without any kind of protection was the Friday night, would've been last night. Now is the Saturday night, and the very last of all of it, the very last time we are still on good terms.

(I think it's the time I didn't get to kiss August, but maybe that was earlier in the fall. Because it is only okay to kiss women, because in addition to every other insecurity, doesn't actually believe in bisexuality or recognize it as a real threat. My queerness is an additional fuck you.)

Half my life since we broke up. Half my life since after.

I did it.

I made it to 36 without fucking up someone half my age. I made it to 36 with relationships that are good, with partners that love who _I_ am and not just what I can do for them. I made it to 36 and can have sex that is joyful and funny and weird and hot and kinky and consensual and consensual and consensual and consensual.

"And it isn't my fault that the barbarian raped me"

I made it to 36, and in less than twelve hours I'll be more than half my life since him. Not just without him --from first meeting to last was only ever five years, we've done that over and over-- but _since_ him. Half my life _since_ I was raped. Half my life _since_ I was abused.

Half my life since I tried to set myself on fire to keep someone else warm. I am already full of warmth, I will share that with joy. I don't need to burn to provide it.

I'm just going in circles with this, but I'm okay with that, because I've been going in circles for eighteen years. Cycles of healing and hurting, of getting better and suddenly worse. It's part of being human, not leaving things totally behind. And I wouldn't dream of trying to write of what my life was like in the before. Too much of it is here in after.

Almost the majority, in fact.

Happy Anniversary, kSatyr Wulfsohn. You lost and it is entirely your own fault. I hope you figure that out someday, and I hope that it chokes you into actually becoming a better person.

None worked the ways to break me you contrived.
Fuck you I'm not a victim: I survived.

~R.
MOOP!

On dreamwidth, trigger warnings go both ways. Sexual and emotional abuse allusions.

Some things I managed to do this afternoon and evening:

Small breakdown after school. Missed a bunch of the all-district department meeting. I am _assured_ by my work bestie that I missed absolutely nothing, which is at least a little reassuring.

(It's been a hard couple weeks at work. I would like it if I felt that my bosses were on my team and trying to support me and mine. I would settle if they were at least able to proactively say "I recognize how hard this latest bullshit is to deal with, and appreciate that you're doing so")

Talked to work bestie for an hour. That was nice. Good discussion of art, of dreams, of movie-making of the value of the act of doing things as different from the value of those things existing later. Clayton is really fucking smart and I'm very happy to be friends with him and get to consume his perspective on things.

When he went off to make copies, I managed to persuade my brain that things would be better if I just did a bare-minimum todo list and fucked off home. Managed to leave the building by like 5:45, which is pretty damn good for "didn't start prep until after 5". Meant I biked home before the sun went down which was good.

Got home and had a Power Hour. Ate dinner. Had a more different second power hour. Forest successfully gamified me by being all "~ooo~ look at the special tree that you can only earn if you do 300 minutes of focused time between now and like five days from now" and having it actually be a very pretty tree. So I'm gonna try for that, which means lots of Power Hours in the next few days. That is...that is not a bad thing.

Some stuff I managed during POWER HOURS:

*Desk is cleaned off, like fully, which I think has not been true since like...well? before my surgery? I could actually _use the computer at my desk_ which is astonishing. We'll see how long it lasts.

*Unpacked from MD trip, got all the laundry downstairs, third load is in the washer now, first load is put away *and* it was the one that had the most hangy-laundry, jegus fuck, I'm proud of myself for that.

*Dishfairy. Nothing special there.

*Went out to the garage and learned I don't seem to own a protractor, which, uh, is throwing a wrench into at least one project I should be working on right now. That's fine, I'll swipe one from work, but also what the fuck.

*Also found a thing in the garage and did a thing in my room and am feeling quite a lot of feelings about it, so we're not gonna talk about that one more until I actually decide what to do with them. Practice being bad at things, probably. Engage with the act of doing things for the sake of the act rather than the sake of the things. All of that is fine, but I wish it didn't come with a side of a very particular insecurity/inadequacy that I fully recognize and I *think* is the same thing that made me write the shittiest LJ post I ever wrote on purpose (like sixteen years ago, apparently. It's less bad than it could be but also jegus _fuck_ Sor, you were goin' through it weren't you?)

It is very funny how "not gonna talk about that one" actually manifests, isn't it? ANYways, I think this might be the first time I've ever specifically tagged _exactly that feeling_ as _oh it goes with those moments_.

*Also I apparently have three separate versions of Vienna Teng's "The Tower", one of which I'd never listened to before (to be fair, it's from her live concert album Moment Always Vanishing, and I only quite recently obtained that one). The 2001 version showed up in shuffle and I said "yeah, that seems good to listen to" and _really_ liked some of the differences in musicality. And then I did the live Vienna/Alex Wong version and _holy shit_.

I got not quite halfway through before Gabriel _grabbed_ me and pushed me onto the dance floor. There are advantages to actually cleaning my room, having space to dance is one of the biggest. He and I danced to that one, and then I wrapped with the regular version and let Alis take her turn with me. It was really fucking good for me. Dancing is _really_ fucking good for me.

It's a good reminder that sometimes we can be our own love with intuition.

Hopefully tomorrow will also be good? That would be nice.

~Sor
MOOP!

Had a _really_ lovely weekend with SamSam's family. Highlights:

*Nine of us biked to the beach together, me taking the tail with my giant ass-cargo bike. The roads were mostly dirt, sand, and gravel, it was a terrible choice, I had a wonderful time. Seeing the ocean was real good and I liked also watching the hermit crabs run around in the tide pool --there were so many!

*Later four of us biked to the cranberry bog to pick berries. This would've worked better had we not gradually realized that every batch of berries was comorbid with a small little section of poison ivy. We rinsed our hands and managed to all avoid getting rashes, but then we had to decide what to do with the berries we had already gathered. Sam was first to get rid of theirs, and tossed them into the pond. YES GOOD SUCH GREAT NOISES, the rest of us immediately followed.

*Ben and I managed to drag four total beginners through ringing Erin on bodies. Ringing on bodies is _the best_ and I had forgotten how much easier it is to do with dancers, and that's so good. I took some notes about how to do it, so hopefully that will go better in the future. I still have not yet internalized what direction to set up/start plain hunt though (we walked the wrong way to begin and had to switch the orientation of the set)

*Elanor and different-Ben wrote a little fifteen minute play for us all to perform. I believe there was only one person who was consistently in the audience, the rest of us all kept running up and down to/from the stage for our parts. There was one table-read and zero rehearsals. My script got caught in the curtain while it was opening so I had to awkwardly lean behind me to look at my scene-partner's. It was very stupid and delightful! It felt _excessively_ Melendy (honestly, a lot of the weekend did, and now I'm craving rereading a bunch of those).

*After, Steve taught us a game at a pool table that involved trying to roll the cue ball (by hand) to hit the single other ball before that other one stopped moving. Once you got them to hit, it was the next person's turn to grab the cue ball from wherever it was, and send it off. We played largely non-competitive and got eight of us going in a little cycle for a while. Extremely satisfying game!

*I played Crokinole yesterday morning with Sam. I'm _rubbish_ at it, but it's a very tactilely satisfying game so now I want to play more. I wonder if I can become a secret crokinole sharp using common household items?

*Thom and Liz bundled me and Laurel off after dinner on Saturday to Plan Their Wedding Dance. It was very cute to be in that space with people I love and doing something I have a lot of expertise in *and* bouncing that expertise off someone else with a lot of expertise. I think it'll be a nice little dance! There's gonna be a small group of Scottish dances for people who know what they're doing first, and it was _extremely_ funny for Thom to name dances, me or Laurel to go "wait how's that one go?" and Liz to immediately start singing the tune, which is not...*not* how they go, but is absolutely not what either of the callers were requesting.

There's probably more, but that's the big things I can remember this morning. Now it's time to head to work and do some of the grading I completely neglected.

~Sor
MOOP!

Work was a lot because work was always a lot. Bonus lots for today: did some graphic design on the performance task so people are able to hand it out tomorrow. Sent the big NEML email to all the coworkers and began gathering data there. Ran a circle for the department meeting, because when my boss does it, she skips over a bunch because she doesn't take it seriously.

So between all that, and normal work stuff, I was slammed right up until the bell rang, and then we had an hour of department meeting (solidly okay) and an hour of Geometry team meeting (quite good, very productive) and then Clayton and I (plus bonus Rachel) had like half an hour of talking about grand ideas for making the curriculum better and then I threw everyone out of my room because it was 4:30 and aaah.

But I managed to keep going, and then I prepped my lessons for tomorrow and ran several billion copies (more NEML stuff) and left the building by about 6:15 or so. Was home at 7:30ish, checked in with Ezri, sent a plan to Tuesday, and flopped into the bed to play a bit of Necrodance just to do _something_ mindless with my day.

(being Mindful all the time forever sucks. I am trying to do more of it because a lot of my mindless is the kind where I can't transition out of it again, and despite what the hypnokink people would have you think, it's not as sexy when you're a mindless phone-games machine. But being real aware and Mindful of what I am doing and trying to make conscious choices about it is differently hard.)

Then, pleasant shock (see above paragraph), I actually transitioned out of Necrodance around the time I told Tues I would, and did some brainwork and then turned the phone off for a POWER HOUR. Dishes, dinner, wash hair were the three goals. They were all completed? This is wild and I don't know how to cope.

The next plan is to again check in with Tuesday --I like having partners who I can mutually do things with, even when we are far apart-- and then Iunno. Rest? Sounds fake.

~Sor
MOOP!

Gonna have to do the bullshit thing where I write down the things that I did today, because my shitbrain is pretty convinced I haven't done enough and I'm not actually gonna be able to defeat it with logic and data, but I can at least try.

So here's some things I did today:

*Went to bells! First time at bells since the weekend before my surgery, I think? So that's basically two months or so. I rang some stuff, pretty badly, because, as mentioned, haven't been in an age. It was nice to see some folks, and very nice to spend time at the end on the greenway in the warm weather chatting with Kyle.

*Also I got a bagel and said hello to Leo the BagelMonger who is a friend of mine and I was happy to see still exists and extremely happy to hear is taking his partner to go see the MONSTER TRUCKS tonight, that is so dope I am very jealous.

*After bellslunch, I went to the _library_ that is in the North End, because I'd never been, but Julia very kindly checked out a book for me ages ago (for surgery, because I was like seven billionth on the list for the ebook) and I needed to return it, and also I was bold and asked the librarians if I could also get a library card and they were very much "HELL YEAH!" and now I have a third library card in my wallet to go with the NESFA and Minuteman ones.

(I like that my brain briefly forgot what the system was called, attempted to combine Minuteman and Middlesex, and had a solid ten seconds of "it can't possibly be a Middleman library card, I would've noticed")

Anyways, my BPL card has lions on it, and then I walked a circuit of the library to look at its books and stuff and I found three books to check out and when I brought them to the desk, the nice librarian who helped me before was all "oh hey this one is really good!" about one of the ones I picked, so I got an A+ in libraries, which is a thing that is possible to do and reasonable to want.

*Got on the T, rode to Porter Square, went to Bicycle Belle, picked up my Xtracycle, now with bonus brakes on both the back *and* front wheels. Talked to the folks. Was admired by a random patron directly outside the bike store. I am kinda psyched for this nonsense, and extremely aaah but excited that I will get to take it on an ADVENTURE next weekend.

*Biked home and did nothing productive but did finish the back half of Late Eclipses. Yes, I am _extremely_ overdue for a booklog post. This is partly because I read fuckall this summer, which I feel bad about, and especially because I have been pissshit poor at actually keeping up with my booklog, which I also feel bad about. It's probably stupid to feel bad about the things that are not actual obligations and just stuff I do for myself _but also_ I'm the one I have to live with, so *shrug*.

*Eventually I took the laundry downstairs and ran two loads of it.

*I managed to clean up like...ten things total from my desk. This has not made an appreciable difference in the state of my desk, sigh.

*Tuesday is here, and I am happy for it, in between being very not-wanna about _everything_. Right now she is curled up next to me all sleepy and it's wonderful and feels really good and safe and happy. I wish my brain would shut the fuck up and let me be more happy about the world, but it's nice to at least have small joys.

*Oh yeah, I did finally do a whole bunch of fucking futureplanning, stuff needed for the four upcoming weekends of doing things (it's not quite four consecutive, I think it's two on, then a break, then two more). Ashanty/biking/camping, then MD and Rennfaire (Oct19), then nothing, then Liz and Thom's wedding, then Racheline and Patty's wedding. I was maybe gonna go to Northampton the weekend after that for a dance thing, but I think it would be extremely smart of me to _not_ do that, because jegus fuck, no, I need to be home slightly more than that.

(At some point I need to suss Thanksgiving).

*But yeah, that was like...multiple different emails and sorting tasks and stuff. I reserved a hotel room and bought train tickets and offered to share bedding with someone and aaah there are so many things. I have put a data point in my email spreadsheet tho, and putting data points into it is a good first step to actually like...interacting with the inbox0 project.

And I wrote my words, and I suppose that's a pretty good thing even if I'm just gonna go back and play more bullshit phone games in a second.

~Sor
MOOP!

Whiiiite rabbit. Whuf.

Haven't been writing here! Work has been eating a lot of my brain, and also some ~other stuff~ has been eating a lot of my brain. At least one of those things I can't talk about here. Another I don't _want_ to talk about here. It's not been great.

Today's a little better though. Dirt beneath my nails, I crawl my way back from the forest. Work is genuinely going really well and I like it a lot, even if my work responsibilities for this year are keeping me _busy_. I'm a building rep for my union, which means another couple meetings a month. I'm on the Equity Team which *also* means another couple meetings a month. I'm mentoring a new teacher who's enrolled in a grad program that means _another_ couple meetings a month (weekly with them, I think there's been 2-3 so far with the program?). I'm teaching three inclusion classes this year, which means me and my co-teacher really need to formally have at least one meeting a week for planning purposes. (She and I get along so well that we are, uh, doing more than that which is lovely but also oh god, when do I prep?)

But other stuff today has been real good too. Equity Team made me go look up my Gender Presentation that I gave like seven times between Feb'22 and June'23, and then haven't done since. It's really good! Like actually entirely solid! I should apply to do that as a PD more often, make other teacher have to talk and think about gender some! It felt good to look back at something I'd made in the past and feel like it was an accomplishment.

I was a bit faffy during after-school-preptime, but I did manage to get all my copies done. Well, okay, the paper part is done, I technically have a date with a stapler sometime tomorrow to get the packets together (sigh). Hm, and I didn't finish making my lesson plans for tomorrow. That's fine, that just means early morning at school I guess.

I've been keeping up with the grading, which is surprising, but not in a bad way. I'm not quite done everything I want to be done with, but it's pretty close, and I feel like I've done a good job of all of it. Yay me!

Got home, immediately swapped out my clothes, and collected my Xtracycle (which needs a name, both my other bicycles have names²) and dragged it down to Bicycle Belle, to see if they could help me with the brakes issue (it doesn't have a front one). I chose to go the extra 0.25 miles because BB is open an hour later on Wednesday than Ace Wheelworks ever is, and also because they specialize in cargo bikes, so I figured it was a good match. Plus, most recent Wheelworks trip had the pendulum back on the "sneering at casuals and women" side of things. Not drastically so, but something about the shop was raising my hackles, and I am _thrilled_ to say that Bicycle Belle entirely passed that vibe check. Even when I was asking stupid questions, I did not feel like anyone thought I was stupid, and that's very pleasant.

Got home again, attempted to repair the flat on Vin and...uh. Huh. Apparently when we got the puncture-resistant tyres in 2019 (!), they are basically impossible to take off the rims, which means I'm pretty much assuming my two most recent blowouts (last November and last week) were just the rubber giving way on the tubes finally. I think the right answer is "purchase some tyres that are not puncture resistant and go back to being able to easily repair your own flats" but I am extremely annoyed that I will probably have to bring my stupid bike to a stupid bike shop just to do a repair that I can ordinarily do in my backyard in ten minutes. Unless someone wants to come be stronk for me and de-tyre the thing.

Wasn't too badly shook mood-wise, and then when chatting with SamSam about it, I alluded to the time that my bike (parked) got hit by a car and the wheel was all bent to shit. Plugging in my photo-hard-drive to try and dig up the photo (success!) left me sitting on the couch with my photo-hard-drive plugged in. I tagged about 400 more photos, which feels like good progress. Only 317 to go in the current batch, and then I have a hundred more batches!

I also paid Ezri for some rent (a lot of rent, both back and forward), and then I finally set up an account on YouNeedABudget, since I've been hearing good things about them for forever. I don't know if I've set it up correctly yet, but we'll see how it works out.

I ate dinner somewhere in there?

Now I should go to bed because it's nearly midnight, and aforementioned "you have to wake up early so you can finish your damn prep". Sigh.

GOODNIGHT!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Just as crazy as before. But I am breathing, I am laughing, taking one step at a time.

2: My regular bike is Vin, named for the heroine of the Mistborn trilogy, because at the time it was the most recent Strong Female Character I'd read, and that is my official naming schema. My folding bike is informally called The Bromps (because it's a Brompton) but its formal name is RuthEP, pronounced Rooth-eep.

Tonight's adventure was going to a Jazz Emu concert with a bunch of my polycule!

The concert was at the Sonia, where I hadn't thought I'd ever been, but I looked up at one point to see the old sign for TT The Bear's Place and had my heart sing. The stage is a lot higher than it used to be, which was good for a concert where we were mostly sitting in chairs looking up to the stage.

He sang a bunch of new songs, interleaved with comedy Bits and other general nonsense. It was a lot of fun to go see a show for a guy who I kinda know of, but don't obsessively follow. Sometimes it's good to have a hundred people for whom you're the ninth favourite thing. I was delighted when he closed out with three of his already known and published songs --it was both fun to hear a live version of something at least two partners have separately made me watch, and REALLY fun to jam out to songs that I didn't know but the people around me were incredibly into. People watching is so good!

After, Tess-Todd-Phoebe-Austin went off to get ice cream, and me and Tuesday loitered for a bit. I purchased a cassette tape, mostly for the utter delight of purchasing a cassette at a kinda divey venue in the year that starts with a 20. This is 1980s shit, and I'm thrilled to be part of it!

We were rewarded by the man himself poking his nose out for the half dozen die-hards who had loitered. He was very clearly exhausted --and his accent is much easier to pin down when he's not Performing, so when he said "I'm exhausted from jet lag" I could make a much better guess about what that meant. But it was pleasing to get in the quick "you did awesome, it was a lot of fun!", and also nice to get that little peek behind the scenes.

It was a really delightful night, and a good reminder that actually there are some pretty awesome little concert spots tucked around my city, and I should find more of them and go to more shows just for the fuck of it. I mean, who has time and all, but live performances are a lot of fun, and I like having them in my life.

~Sor

MOOP!

PostScript: Okay, holy shit, was glancing at the wikipedia page and found out that before he was in full Jazz Emu mode, he wrote one of the best twitter threads of all time? It's rare to have such a Neil Cicierega moment that's not actually by NeilCic!

(the thread is the top song from every decade dating back to the 14000s BC. Grab your headphones, it's very stupid and funny)

[A Neil Cicierega moment is that moment when you are laughing at something funny on the internet, or reminiscing about something old, or being amused by a weird cool thing, and then you realize that it is yet another project by That One Guy]