sorcyress | Entries tagged with lessthan31words

Hear ye hear ye!

Okay, so like...there's a pandemic and that's...not great, and is kinda taking a toll on everyone's mental health, and making it hard to be arsed to ~do stuff~ or remember what responsibilities you've agreed to do. I'm using the version of "you" that actually means "me" here. Because last year I attempted to run my Less Than 31 Words Porn event, and then never got around to posting the entries.

(In my small partial defense, I only had two on the post itself and a small handful of others in email and such, and therefore I was waiting for more until I forgot about the project and then it was mid-April and awkward).

BUT!

PORN IS GOOD AND PORN IS NIGH!

Short version: You should write me some pornography! You should ensure said pornography is, at most, 30 words long. You should (ideally) post it as a comment to this post, anonymous if you so choose. You could also email or discord message or whatever me, but that does run a risk of it vanishing into the ether. (If you think you did this last year, it would be amazing if you re-sent the stuff, but no worries or not.)

On February 25th, I will post ~the porns~. I am picking a specific, completely arbitrary¹ date as a form of accountability for myself and also so y'all know when to poke me in the ribs and demand I provide you with porm.

If you want more details, or plenty of examples, the tag to clicken is Less Than 31 Words.

Yayyyyyyyy! Bring something positive and playful and fun out of the snow and ice please!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Obviously I would never use this contest to flirt with people I like in any way, and definitely not in a meta-way like choosing their birthday as the publication date so that they get a cute little present. That would be heavily biased and wrong and also I've never dated anyone with a birthday in February before².

Obviously. >.>

2: this year

I will edit this post properly later, but this is going to be the official post for my annual(ish) Less Than 31 Words Porn Writing Event!

If you don't know what I'm talking about, feel free to consult relevant tag for more info.

If you DO know what I'm talking about, gimme them porms! (Also if you knew you wrote any last year, and want to re-send them that would be very grand, since I can attempt to find them but it's been a complicated computer situation and I'm not positive I know where they are.

UPDATED SEVERAL HOURS LATER TO HAVE ACTUAL INFORMATION:

So here's the more accurate explanation:

In 2008, six scant months after I'd turned eighteen, I was joking around on the internet and wrote an incredibly stupid porn story that was mostly an excuse to shout VAGEENER a few times. It was about thirty words long. Shortly thereafter, I decided (inspired by a livejournal friend I've long since lost track of) that this was a good idea, and maybe other people should write porn that was thirty words long.

And thus was born the Less Than 31 Words porn writing event! It is two posts a year, and I ran it consistently for about eight years before The Death Of Livejournal (and also my mental health) made me lose track of it again. I finally restarted in 2019, but missed 2020, which is frankly probably for the best given how shitshow the year was.

Post the first:
This post! This is the post in which I collect the porn! All the comments on this post are screened and will always stay that way forever. If you enjoy writing porn, you can write one (or several, or a lot) and post it in a comment(s) here. You do not have to be logged in, anonymous porn is fine! Yay porn!

Post the second:
In a few weeks! Definitely at least two weeks from now, but also before the end of February. I sit down with All The Porn and I randomize it (using a d20 hell yeah) and then I post it ALL ANONYMOUS under a cut. People read porn! The comments on that post are not screened and people talk about the porn they like! Sometimes people fess up to which ones they wrote, but that is NOT MANDATORY.

Rules: Don't be rude about other people's porn preferences. Don't use this as an excuse to send me heinously gross imagery about maggots because you're pissed I broke up with you. Don't use more than thirty words. That's all the rules!

Feel free to share this post with other people, if you're into that. The one thing I ask is that you don't connect my wallet name to my handle (so like, if you're gonna post about this on FB, don't tag me in).

Have fun!

~Sor
MOOP!

*clears throat*

WARNING! This entry contains porn of a hardcore and softcore nature! Read at your own risk!

I think that's the way I do it, anyways. It's been a while.

First the data, because I am into data! Oh boy, am I into data. Unf, unf, etc.

New Porms: 15 from 2015. 31 from 2019!!! Y'ALL MAKE MY HEART SING THANK YOU!
New Fandoms: She-Ra! Microsoft, Harry Potter, chess(board game)
New Poetic Forms: Spot the Iambic Pentameter! And another couplet!
New Languages: Have I had Latin before? It's been a while, I genuinely don't remember! Quick, someone build me a searchable database of all the porms with serious tagging so I can sort out things like this.
Other Milestones:
*I got a porm with a soundtrack! That's pretty cool and has never happened before! Look for the linked song.

*Not a single one of you fuckers posted anonymously which is like...I dunno, weirdly cool? I feel trusted, I suppose! And like a facilitator of good times and sexy feelings, which okay, the whole service thing I was posting about last night? It's not _only_ non-sexual.

*In between the last time I ran the event and this time, I was gifted a single-page chapbook with fifteen examples of <31wp. It was from a friend I've known literally my entire life, who said they felt uncomfortable posting to my page (because I'm just a kid, yanno?) but was inspired nonetheless. I don't remember if I've ever shared this fact, but it's one of the things I am most proud of having inspired. (I did not bother to transcribe them here, mostly because I'm not positive I could quickly lay hands on the book and I have other things to do tonight than get caught in the trap that is my filing cabinet.)

To quote Andy Weir¹, I, like many ~~webcomic~~ artists, humbly hope that my art moves someone, somewhere, to masturbate. Thank you.

( Enjoy! Please feel free to leave comments squeeing about your favourites --show the artists some love! Possibly lots of love *waggles eyebrows* )

That's all folks!

I started this exercise as one hundred percent a joke. I mean, literally, the first porn written for this was 29 words of bullshit in the middle of a group chat. It was a RPF referencing a Something*Positive comic. It was not good. I want to be very clear that it was in absolutely no way the sort of work of art that should have spawned something like this.

It has spawned over 400² short works of fiction. Funny, sensual, heart-catching, sympathetic, charming, and yes, sexy as all hell fiction.

I...some of you have asked me, in some form or another, how you can help. This is how you can help. By bringing creativity into the world and a smile to my face. By making things, even when the things you make are short and silly and sexy. By being genuine and excitable and telling your friends and sharing your ideas.

Thank you so much to everyone who wrote, to everyone who reads, and to everyone who serves as a muse. The pornpocaylpse is real, and scary. Thank you so much for pushing back.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Yes, the srs bsns science fiction author responsible for The Martian. I'm probably due a reread of Casey and Andy sometime.

2: My official file of posted porms says this year's entry makes 407. The actual number is maybe as many as a dozen higher, but I don't remember where the file of "not actually posted" porms got to.

*checks calendar, rolls neck, cracks knuckles*

GOOD MORNING MY FRIENDS. ARE YOU AWARE WHAT DAY IT IS?
IT'S FEBRUARY 3RD!
AND AFTER AN UNFORTUNATE DORMANCY CAUSED BY...STUFF¹
IT'S TIME TO BRING BACK THIS, MY FAVOURITE EVENT:

Welcome to the official EIGHT AND A HALFTH ANNUAL LESS THAN 31 WORD PORN WRITING EVENT!

"Sorry, the *what*??" you say because you haven't been my dreamwidth friend for years and years or whatever. This is a collaborative writing event I used to run every February, because February is a shitty and bleak month. People (anonymously or not) write me Hot Porms using a maximum of thirty words, near the end of the month I publish them all (totally anonymously) and we all get to enjoy a spot of hot and bothered in these, the Bad Times.

The last time I fully ran it was 2014. There was an attempt in 2015, but I was distracted by _stuff_ and only got like 15 total entries anyways, which is pretty low. I will be posting all those porms alongside the rest I get this year, even if "the rest" is the three I've written in the last couple months. I do swear on my honor as a ~~girl scout~~ dirty dirty slut that I will post all of these by the end of the month though.

Here's the most important details, in the blockquoty box:

STEP ONE: Write porn. Silly or sexy or fanfic or reallife or funny or erotic, whatever. Make sure the porn is less than thirty-one words. Use the lessthan31words tag to look up previous examples.

STEP TWO: Post the porn in the comments here. They are screened. You can post anonymously² if you'd like. You can also email or IM me porn.

STEP THREE: Tell your friends to come to this post and do the same.

STEP FOUR: At the end of the month, I post (hopefully) a whole heap of porn3 and we all benefit!

I think that's everything I need to say. Go forth, my erotic friends, and create something small and beautiful for this world!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Mental illness and everyone leaving long-form blogging, mostly.

2: "So like, you have track IP addresses on what's the point of screening comm-" well ignoring the part where it ruins the surprise, I do solemnly swear not to track down who wrote what unless you're my abusive ex-boyfriend and you write me totally horrifying and definitely non-erotic descriptions of maggots and the like. Which happened the first year of the contest. So as long as you keep it intentionally sexy, and not gross as hell, we're cool.

3: Well, full disclosure, I've chosen not to post like...three or four total porms that I've received (not counting the abovementioned gross) because they were too far on the side of rapey to make me comfortable. If that's your kink, then that's cool, but I reserve the right to not post anything that makes me squicked out.

PostScript: Yes, I frequently spell "porn" as "porm". I do the same thing with "corm". I am not totally clear why this is. It's not necessarily me being twee, as much as me being weird.

PostScript two: Just because I like bragging, I have received porn in multiple languages (include a *very* dirty chicken one), in multiple poetic forms, and a great many fandoms. The stars are the limit! Ooo, sexy starporn? Don't mind if you do...

EDIT ONE: Just reiterating that the eventual posting of the porn will be totally one hundred percent anonymous. People can (and sometimes do) identify which ones they wrote in the comments if they want, but no one is obligated to ID themselves, and I will not ID you (or me).

EDIT TWO: Also reiterating that the part in STEP ONE where I said use the tag to look up examples? Links to the LessThan31Words tag, which I do use consistently, and is attached to every entry on the topic I've made so you can see the examples from previous years.

Or, taken directly from one of those aforementioned posts that were linked, here's a pre-made version: 2014,2013, 2012, 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008. (Warning: all links except 2014 go to livejournal instead of dreamwidth.)

HEY GUESS WHAT
HEY
HEY
GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS!
IT'S FEBRUARY THIRD!!!!!!!!

"Why yes it is Sor, your powers of observation are amazing, what does this have to do with the rest of the us?"

February third is officially the start date of the Less Than 31 Words Porn Writing ~~contest~~Collaborative Exercise!¹ I run this ~~contest~~event in my livejournal every year in February, because February is a bleak and horrible month and needs to be punished. Punished with HOT STORIES!

Give unto me your erotic, your silly, your sensual, your kinky, your true, your fictional, your PORN! Just make sure you do so in an absolute maximum of thirty words. The comments on this post are completely screened, and will never be unscreened. You may leave comments/porns anonymously or not. You can send them to me through email, text, or IM.

Feel free to explore whatever sexualities, fetishes, languages, poetic structures, etc that you want. There is no shaming here for content, although I do reserve the right to not post your porms if I deem them kinda rapey. (I think I have done this about twice ever in eight years.)

SO GO! WRITE! And for the love of gods, please feel free to link this post to people you feel would appreciate and participate. I don't want this contest to die out just because LJ is a ghost town. I don't know where else I could sustain such a glorious beast.

With inspiration to you all!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Basically, it hasn't been a contest since the first year, and it wasn't even really then, but

2: motherfucking limericks, even!

((Want more information and/or inspiration? Click Here to see all previous solicitation and presentation posts! SO MUCH GOOD PORN, Y'ALL!))

ETA: In case I have not made it clear, porn will be collected for much of the month of February, and then posted to this account. I will make announcements. Is good!

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/706763.html

AWRIGHT ALREADY! You hear there may be cold and gloomy weather coming back again? Well step right up, and get yerself cozy for something that'll warm the cockles of your...heart. I speak, of course, of the grand and glorious Less Than 31 Word Porn Entries, 2014!

(Yes, it's like two weeks later than they should be. Shut up!)

So. Beneath the cut, ( this entry contains porn of a hardcore and softcore nature. Read at your own risk! )

Number of Porns: 32 (was 26 until I realized there were 4 more on Dreamwidth and two more from last year. Yay!). Y'all are gradually falling down on the job, and I don't know how to fix it. I guess Tumblr isn't too ill-suited --you could all anon-submit to me pretty easily over there. But damnit livejournal. Stop dying.
New Languages: Igpay Atinlay, Toki Pona, Esperanto, and yes, Dogespeak.
New Fandoms: James Bond!
New Poetry: Nothing new, but another quatrain and another haiku.
Still awesome: Still awesome.

One thing I've never talked about is how I randomize them. I always do, as one more layer of protection --I toss them all in a (roughly chronological) file, and then sit there with a d20 and hop my way through the list. Sometimes I do a little bit of work to randomize the starting point, and I will occasionally bend bits and pieces so certain ones are in a proper order, but overall, it's just a very soothing process.

As always, please leave comments telling the authors that they rock and they've written things
that made you smile, horny, pleased.

And thank you all for participating. Reading, writing, sharing, anything.

~Sor
MOOP!

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/683083.html

Here is the good thing in my life, one of the best and nicest things.

It is February, a bleak and grey month, and though I am a couple days late with the announcement, February is host to The Seventh Annual Less-Than-Thirty-One-Words Porn Contest!

This is not actually a competition so much as an excuse for creative exercise! The goal of the project is to write erotic and/or pornographic stories, using only 30 words or fewer. That's it. 30 is fine. 29 is fine. 31 is RIGHT OUT, and so are all numbers higher.

All the comments are screened, and will never be unscreened. You can post under your real user ID or anonymously. No one ever has to know who wrote what (including me), unless you decide to say.

My friends are mindblowingly creative, which means that I've received literally hundreds of these erotic short stories so far. I have received fanfiction and funny stories and things that made me go "oh!" and kink and fetishes and sweet loving romance that made me go "aww!" and everything else under the sun. I have received porn in, I believe, seven different languages¹. This contest is meant to bring some of the awful out of February, and it does that so well.

Entries will be collected all month, and posted sometime around the 28th. Hopefully not in March, like I did last year. Feel free to spread the word of this contest as much as you would like, and whereever you would like. Hell, feel free to post about it on Facebook or something, if that's what suits you, just please (if you know it) keep my wallet name² separate from my handle.

Now go my friends, and WRITE! And if you need inspiration...read: 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008.

~Sor
MOOP!

1: ASL, Chicken, Latin, Perl, Russian, Spanish, and Japanese. Probably also lolcat at some point, though I can't remember a specific. Maybe this year will include Dogespeak?

2: I forget who I first heard this term from, but I love it so so so much. Sor, Kat, and Erik are all my "real name" in equal part. None of them are the name I apply to jobs under or get things out of the bank with.

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/678875.html

So, uh.

I have failed in my duties. Horribly. This is unfortunately, a thing I am used to saying of myself. But this year, it was impressive just how far past the deadline I have ambled.

I am talking, of course, about pornography. The Less Than 31 Words Porn Contest to be exact, which is a contest meant to run throughout the month of February. We're almost halfway through March. My only possible excuse is "I was away for a while", which frankly doesn't hold an ounce of water, since I had plenty of time and internet in California.

BUT!

I do get around to a great many things given a long enough time frame. This year, that time frame happened to involve fourteen days that it shouldn't have, but whatever. Mistakes were made. Let's get over them, and onto the important part of this post:

Ahem. ( This post contains written pornography of a hardcore and softcore nature. Read at your own risk. )

Vital Stats:

Number of Porns: 45, plus 2 over, plus 1 I didn't post because it wasn't written by the person submitting it (and I don't want to use other people's words without their awareness.), plus 1 bonus I wrote while making this post.
New languages: ASL. I GOT A PORN IN ASL! My friends are FECKING AWESOME!
New fandoms: Surprisingly none! Fanfic free year, weeeeird.
New forms of poetry: More limericks! More quatrains! I LOVE YOU ALL!
Is this project still awesome: You tell me, but my opinion is oh gods yes.

If you like them, please comment and say --I know authors love hearing that their work is appreciated! And next year, I'm gonna try and promote the hell out of this thing, because the alternative is to just accept the sad confirmation that livejournal is dying and I refuse to let that happen to my favourite social media.

~Sor
MOOP!

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/656013.html

Hear ye, hear ye! I, Sor Kyress, being of horny body and strange mind, do observe the date of this day to be the third day of February, in the year 2013. That means it's time to run my favourite feature of this livejournal: The Sixth Annual <31 Word Porn Competition!

(Not actually a competition.)

In case you are new, the way it works is this: The comments to this entry are screened. You write me porn, or smut, or erotica, or cheesy romance, or whatever suits your fancy. I keep it hidden for a few weeks, and then near the end of the month, I make a post with a WHOLE BUNCHA DIRTY STORIES! Everyone reads them and rejoices!

What are the rules of the contest? There is but one formal rule: Less than 31 words! Thirty is fine. Twenty-nine is fine. Thirty-one? RIGHT OUT. Keep it short!

There are some unstated rules that sorta boil down to "I claim editorial duty over these stories, and if you write something that I find really triggering or non-consensual or dubious-consensual or gross or otherwise not something I'm willing to post public, I won't." If you object to this, host your own damn porn-writing contest.

If you need inspiration, you can browse the LessThan31Words tag on my livejournal, or just jump straight to a previous year's entries (2012, 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008.)

Now get writing, mein lieblings!

~Sor
MOOP!

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/652165.html

So I counted all the porns, and realized I had sixty-seven. Because I am an immature sort of person, I went ahead and wrote two more. I went ahead and used them to bookend the set, because authors are always allowed to out themselves.

You are all my favourite people forever. In the five years since this project began, I have received more than 250 original, creative, wonderful little stories. This year, some of you cross-posted to other places, invited other people to come in and share. I cannot believe that people keep indulging me in this --surely, one of these years everyone will have run out of things to write?

Thank you all. Author/Editors notes are in italics. Porn is not safe for work or minors. Enjoy, comment, share, and write me more for next year --I'll accept them year round, if you can live with the potential of me losing them in the year between posting.

( And now enough of my babbling, here's what you all came for (or is that from...) )

New languages this year: Chicken, latin, some programming language I can't identify on sight.

New fandoms this year: Man, I lost count. Homestuck, Les Miz, Princess Bride, Warehouse 13, RPF political, RPF internet personalities, quite plausibly some I missed noticing entirely...

Again, thank you so much to everyone who participates, be it as a writer, reader, commenter, or muse.

See you next February!

~Sor
MOOP!

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/623309.html

I am a pretty shiftless child, one who often starts projects and then gets distracted and never finishes.

However, this project is somewhat important to me, and so somehow I've managed to keep it going every February since I turned eighteen. It's something that makes me happy, and something that makes other people happy. It prompts long essays on censorship, on child-rearing, on the rights of the editor.

...and most importantly, it brings a lot of porn into the world. That's right folks! It's time for the Fifth Annual Less Than 31 Word Porn Writing Contest!

How does this work? You write porn. You make sure it's, at most, thirty words long. You post it in a comment to this post, or you e-mail it to me, or you drop it in my ask-box on tumblr, or whatever. In a few weeks, I collect them all, scramble them, and post them for all the world to enjoy. And it is awesome. You can get a pretty good feel by reading the tag "Lessthan31words".

The porn you submit may be anonymous. It may be fanfic. It may be silly. It may be sexy. It may be written in languages I don't speak (so far: Spanish, Russian, and Japanese.) It may be simple. It may be elaborate. It may be story based. It may be PWP. It may be kinky. It may be *really* kinky. It may be loving. It may be missionary between married people with the lights off. The only rule is that it must be short, at most thirty words. Thirty-one is too many, and thirty-two is right out.

(Okay, because it's my journal and I have feelings about this sort of thing, you are welcome to write noncon or dubcon porn, or otherwise significantly triggering. I am not likely to post it, or if I do, I will post it in an alternate space, clearly marked. This is because I want my porn to be light, fluffy, and happy. And so do a grand number of friends who have had bad experiences. If the fact that I won't post everything pisses you off, go host your own damn porn-writing contest.)

All I want is for you to enjoy writing it, and in a few weeks, for everyone to enjoy reading it. Go forth, my friends, and create!

~Sor
MOOP!

(Need inspiration? The previous years entries: 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008.)

Crossposts: http://kdsorceress.livejournal.com/621113.html

So, here's the deal. I got a hundred and two porns. And now that I am trying to post these, someone is actively writing me more by IM.

My life, you have no idea how awesome it is.

Also, holy shit I have awesome friends.

Author's notes are in italics. Porn is not safe for work or minors. Most of the significantly noncon/dubcon ones are in a file you can request, but I don't promise I got all of them. Look, it's porn. So long as everyone is fictional and happy, it's probably all good. Your kink is not my kink, but your kink is okay. Just make sure all real-life partners are into it.

Author's notes are in italics.

( onward! )

So that's this year! Life has been ridiculously busy since I promised to post this, which has led to this post being worked on multiple times before I actually got anywhere with it. Sorry it's so late --hopefully the pattern of being later every year will *not* continue. I'd like to keep the contest within the confines of February at least.

Everyone who contributed to this project, be it submitting, inspiring, reading, commenting, enjoying...you are great people. Thank you for *being* great people. Thank you for making my February brighter, and making hopefully some other people's Februarys brighter

Now get to the praise. I wanna know which ones you think are the totally hottest!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: See, there's a move in Squares called "Couples Circulate"...

HEY GUYS GUESS WHAT!
IT'S FEBRUARY THIRD!
If that date means nothing to you, it's probably because you're new to this journal, or because you have forgotten what happens every year on February third (or at least, every year since I turned eighteen.

That's right!

It's time for the Annual Less than 31 Words Porn Writing Contest!

This was inspired by a bizarre conversation with mek, in which I wrote the greatest porn ever, and all in less than thirty-one words. The way it works is this: You write porn. I write porn. Everyone writes porn. It can be funny porn, erotic porn, bizarre porn, hot porn, silly porn, kinky porn, missionary-style-with-the-lights-out porn, limerick porn, meta porn, english porn, foreign language porn², fanfic porn, whatever you want to write.

The only restriction is that the porn must be, at most, thirty words. This is why it is called the less than thirty-one words contest, after all.

Then you take the porn, and you leave it in a comment to this post¹, or several comments to this post. You can leave it anonymous, if you want. All the comments will be screened, and I will never reveal what sorts of naughty things you wrote.

Then, in a couple of weeks --definitely before the end of February-- I will compile all the porns I have received into a randomly sorted list, and post it up for the world to enjoy. People will leave comments extolling the virtues of their favourites, and everyone will get to feel all warm and fuzzy about all the lovely words.

If you need examples or inspiration, here are the previous years selections:
2008
2009
2010

Go wild, my darlinks, and write me something *fantastic*!

~Sor
MOOP!

1: Or you e-mail it to me, or IM it to me. Whatever works for you!
2: You lose points for using google translate though. Foreign language porn is best when written by people who actually speak that language.

ETA: Of course I trust you lot. But I like having independent confirmation from people other than the submitters, just in case. So, already, is there anyone out there who can translate Spanish and/or Japanese to make sure I know what's being said?

ETA2: Feel free to crosspost, to share, to link! It leads to more porn for everyone, and that's just excellent!

Yes, yes, I know I promised Saturday. I got distracted.

But for all my lovely perverts out there, have some delicious ( porn! Do not click this link if you object to such. )

You people are pretty much my favourite people ever, just so you know. Enjoy!

Blah blah, this entry not safe for work or children, blah blah.

~Sor
MOOP!

Oh damn, I missed the formal February third announcement by a few hours. I had better as sure damn hell get on that.

See, a couple years ago, it was 2008, I was goofing around with the Katters, and this happened:

Me: So, there was this kid Jake
Me: And he met a girl
Me: And they had really hot sexy sex
Jake: Well, that's usually how it starts
Me: And he put his penis in her vajeener
Me: VAJEENER!
Me: The end
Katters: That was the greatest porn ever
Katters: Ever

And somehow that spawned my single favourite use of this livejournal, now that I'm over eighteen and it's not creepy: The less than 31 words porn contest.

HOW IT WORKS!

You write a porn. You make sure that it is, at maximum, 30 words. If you need inspiration, you go look here(2008) or here(2009)

You then post it in a comment on THIS POST! Comments are screened, so no one can see what a naughty naughty little writer you are. If you wanna leave anonymous porn, go wild. If you wanna leave me a dozen stories, by all means, go wild. If you wanna be kinky, go wild. If you wanna be vanilla, go wild. If you wanna be funny, go wild. If you wanna be erotic, good luck, and go wild!

After a couple weeks, I will collect all the entries (plus any that got e-mailed or IMd to me, and post them all in a nice big anonymous post for everyone to read and enjoy. No one is revealed as a pervert, I get to read lots of clever porn, and everyone is happy.

SO GET WRITING, MY ILLUSTRIOUS WANKERS!¹

~Sor
MOOP!

1: "Illustrious wanker" may be my new favourite phrase ever.

Okay folks, I've been really really busy, but if like...three of you are going to specifically be all "porn?" at me today, I figure I better put these up before I get mobbed.

For reference, last years entries are here. This year's are not in a poll, both because I'm feeling more low key with them, and because I don't have a paid account anymore.

( So yeah. Porn. WOO! )

***

And, as per usual, there are no filters and no "hurr, don't read this if you're young" things. Just...don't read this if you're too young, okay?

~Sor
MOOP!

One year ago today.

One year ago today, it was 2008. And I posted a silly little Quote of the Day that managed to inspire my favourite thing I have ever done with this journal, ever.

See, I think at least part of the reason I started the X Years Ago Today project was so I could celebrate the one year anniversary of this contest I ran, by running it again.

That's right kids. It's time.

Write me a porn story, in thirty words or less. Make it good, sexy, erotic, funny, whatever. If you want, write more than one.

Comments are screened. They will be posted anonymously for everyone to read on the fifteenth or sixteenth --whenever I get back in town from Dance Flurry. I demand porn!

( If you need inspiration, here are some of my favourite examples from last year )

~Sor
MOOP!

So, I do believe that I promised you some ( porn )

*************

Now, you may notice that I haven't bothered to do the magical flagging thing. It is perfectly allowable that one of you attempt to flag this entry, because heaven knows it does deal with adult concepts and shouldn't be read my minors, bla bla bla.

I myself did not, because censorship is one of those things that seriously pisses me off. I agree that there may be things in general that minors should not read, however, I acknowledge that minors are going to find those things and read them anyways.

The real trick is to have people who care around to answer questions and to help morally guide said minors. Alto, they need to emphasize that there is a difference between legal adults engaging in morally questionable practises behind their own doors, where, if something goes wrong, they have the money and world experience to fix it, and illegal kids engaging in the same behaviors, where if something goes wrong, they're (no pun intended) screwed. (Seriously, children should not raise children. I don't know much about the mental aftereffects of getting an abortion, but I've been led to believe that it will definently fuck you up some. Minors should not have* to deal with any of that.)

So, in short, I'm not censoring this. I'd *rather* my little sister didn't read the <31WP's, but if she does, there's not a lot I can do other than remind her not to have sex, and if she does, to be safe about it. And I'm certainly not saying you should go out and show this to minors immediately. But really, if a minor wants to read this, they will --it's laughably easy to change your birthyear on elljay, so even if it was flagged adult, the hypothetical minors reading my journal could just claim to be another few years older, and read it anyways.

(Plus, I have at least two or three people who read my elljay anonymously. I'd rather not cut them out.)

Damn, I got all serious in the middle there. o.O Uhm...yay porn?

~Sor
MOOP!

*They shouldn't have to, but sometimes, it's the better choice.

Writing Challenge:

Write me a porn story, in thirty words or less. Make it good, sexy, erotic, funny, whatever. If you want, write more than one.

If people actually do this, I'll post the best ones in a poll and let people vote for their favourite.

Comments are screened.

~Sor
MOOP!

(DOO EEET! If you don't want me to know it's yours, make it anonymous. C'mon, how can this not be the most entertaining drabble contest ever?)

( Cut for the greatest porn ever. <i>Ever</i>. )

Yeah, that's all. Carry on.

~Sor
MOOP!

(Want context? This Something*Positive explains most of it. Kinda. Well, it's SFW at least. Kinda. The pictures are worksafe. Mostly. Aw shit, I take it back, just don't read this where your mom can see.)

(It's funny because my mom *can* see. :P)

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Katarina Whimsy

May 2025

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Page generated May. 23rd, 2025 06:40 am

MOOP!

The Rantings of a Terminal Optimist

Entries tagged with lessthan31words

A day late? Heaven forbid!

February 3rd is the official start date of the BEST THING!

IT'S PORM TIME!

The most wonderful time...

<31WP 2015

Delicious pornography!

Pornography!

Dirty, dirty, pornography.

(no subject)

WARNING: This entry contains written porn, of a hardcore and softcore manner. Read at your own risk.

(no subject)

(no subject)

The most wonderful time of the year!

WARNING: this entry contains written porn, of a hardcore and softcore nature. Read at your own risk.

Two years ago today!

WARNING: this entry contains written porn, of a hardcore and softcore nature. Read at your own risk.

X Years Ago Today

Warning: This entry contains written porn, of a hardcore and softcore nature. Read at your own risk.

Stollen for Active Apathy, damn her.

Quote of the day:

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May 2025

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