Time to go off on a tangent...
Jun. 2nd, 2004 07:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sorcyress(((This is a tangent post, meaning I'm liable to get started and just type, and not keep on any one topic.)))
It was pointed out to me recently that I'm growing up, and thats part of why I'm changing so much.
And thats very true.
The problem is, I'm growing in a completely different direction from my friends. And yet...I grow not at all.
I am still very very young at heart. I find great joy in rollar coasters and swingsets...
I love swings. I just swing and swing and swing, as high as I possibly can.
'Course, I can't do that anymore, not when the groups around, 'cause of all that synchrononity crap.
I am much younger at heart then the rest of the group. But at the same time, I'm terribly older. I do not understand their games, their customs, their wants and desires. It is almost as though I have been completely removed from their group. Abducted, and then had my brain washed out of their ideas and let sit, to grow ideas of my own.
I can remeber a time when I was on the same wavelength as they. When all I wanted was to be held and hugged, kissed and cuddled.
I still like hugs. A lot. Kind of a way to say "I love you" to someone without just saying it and getting funny looks.
I love you is a funny little phrase. I can remember one time with Veronica when I told her I loved her, but not in a romantic way. It was just the two of us, and it was almost embaressing to admit to my friend that I loved them. That was a long time ago.
Nowadays, I love everyone, and tell them so! If someone does something I like a lot, I will grin and say something along the lines of "I love you so much."
And they will grin and usually agree, by stating that they love me as well. Or, if their a senior techie with an ego to rival Zaphods, they'll simply smile and say "I love me too."
Oh wait. Forgot. He's gone now. Graduated. Dammit.
Damm you.
Couldn't wait another year? *sigh*
no, you really couldn't. You've got collage and all that entails. at least I have ways to keep in touch with you.
*double sigh*
Next year is going to be quieter, not as much fun. Of course, I'm going to say that every year. Senior years going to be the worst. I'll be going somewhere where I don't know anyone, and I'll be leaving three years of friends behind.
Dammit, I miss the seniors. It's been a week and I hate it.
I'm not sure I relized how centrally dependent I was on them 'til they left.
Of course, what I'm really dependent on is hugs. I like them. a lot. They're what keep me going.
It's hard to not hug people. Especially when I love them as much as I love you babe. Wife. *sigh*. I rarely meet people who won't always take my hugs. It's amusing to surprise people with hugs though.
A mini I love you.
*sends hugs out to everyone*
~Sorceress/Kat
MOOP!
Original Tags: growing up, relationships, age, unfiled people, fish, friends, cloneconvo, thoughtstream, v, rlife, gendersex, unfiled people-lrhs, tagged, hugs, cuddling
It was pointed out to me recently that I'm growing up, and thats part of why I'm changing so much.
And thats very true.
The problem is, I'm growing in a completely different direction from my friends. And yet...I grow not at all.
I am still very very young at heart. I find great joy in rollar coasters and swingsets...
I love swings. I just swing and swing and swing, as high as I possibly can.
'Course, I can't do that anymore, not when the groups around, 'cause of all that synchrononity crap.
I am much younger at heart then the rest of the group. But at the same time, I'm terribly older. I do not understand their games, their customs, their wants and desires. It is almost as though I have been completely removed from their group. Abducted, and then had my brain washed out of their ideas and let sit, to grow ideas of my own.
I can remeber a time when I was on the same wavelength as they. When all I wanted was to be held and hugged, kissed and cuddled.
I still like hugs. A lot. Kind of a way to say "I love you" to someone without just saying it and getting funny looks.
I love you is a funny little phrase. I can remember one time with Veronica when I told her I loved her, but not in a romantic way. It was just the two of us, and it was almost embaressing to admit to my friend that I loved them. That was a long time ago.
Nowadays, I love everyone, and tell them so! If someone does something I like a lot, I will grin and say something along the lines of "I love you so much."
And they will grin and usually agree, by stating that they love me as well. Or, if their a senior techie with an ego to rival Zaphods, they'll simply smile and say "I love me too."
Oh wait. Forgot. He's gone now. Graduated. Dammit.
Damm you.
Couldn't wait another year? *sigh*
no, you really couldn't. You've got collage and all that entails. at least I have ways to keep in touch with you.
*double sigh*
Next year is going to be quieter, not as much fun. Of course, I'm going to say that every year. Senior years going to be the worst. I'll be going somewhere where I don't know anyone, and I'll be leaving three years of friends behind.
Dammit, I miss the seniors. It's been a week and I hate it.
I'm not sure I relized how centrally dependent I was on them 'til they left.
Of course, what I'm really dependent on is hugs. I like them. a lot. They're what keep me going.
It's hard to not hug people. Especially when I love them as much as I love you babe. Wife. *sigh*. I rarely meet people who won't always take my hugs. It's amusing to surprise people with hugs though.
A mini I love you.
*sends hugs out to everyone*
~Sorceress/Kat
MOOP!
Original Tags: growing up, relationships, age, unfiled people, fish, friends, cloneconvo, thoughtstream, v, rlife, gendersex, unfiled people-lrhs, tagged, hugs, cuddling
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2004-06-02 06:11 pm (UTC)I know how you feel, yet almost the oposite. My 'inner child' knows how you feel.
But, I have troubles voicing myself, reaching out to people, and such.
I also have trouble standing idiocy.
I suppose I'm anti-social. I don't know why. I used to be almost like every other kid.
/Almost/.
I used to like hugs and everything. I don't know why I changed so much...
Sometimes I feel too old.. sometimes I feel too young.
no subject
on 2005-10-21 01:03 pm (UTC)*Because, as well all know, even then I was thinking of you as Sor.
no subject
on 2005-12-08 12:15 am (UTC)How the hell do you pronounce "Kyu" anyways? Is it "Kai-you" like I'd been saying up until the beginning of this year, or is it "Q" like the boy who sits next to me in math?
~Sor
no subject
on 2005-12-08 01:54 am (UTC)And, yes. It is 'Kai-you'.
no subject
on 2006-02-16 12:25 am (UTC)Damnit, just after I'd started thinking of him as 'Q' too.
Damnation. He's officially just Josh now. :p
~Sor
no subject
on 2006-02-16 04:54 am (UTC)He's Kyu! Or Jose! Or Karen!
no subject
on 2006-04-13 01:19 am (UTC)~Sor
no subject
on 2006-05-03 03:35 am (UTC)no subject
on 2009-10-29 02:32 pm (UTC)CURSE MY INABILITY TO LET YOU HAVE THE LAST WORD IN THESE!
~Sor
no subject
on 2010-03-22 11:11 pm (UTC)But you have to work for it.
no subject
on 2004-06-02 07:12 pm (UTC)And as for growing up, I had/am having a similar thing. I don't like most of my friends music, shows (TV or otherwise), or actors. All three of those are very important to theatre majors, as you know. The best thing is to keep in touch with them, but keep one eye open for someone on the same wavelength as you.
The other eye gets a patch. Arrrr!
I love you Kat ~Veronica
on 2004-06-03 01:13 pm (UTC)oh what the fudge *hug* I like hugs too *hug*.
Ok i'm done now, I think.
*hug*
Veronica
Re: I love you Kat ~Veronica
on 2005-06-24 06:42 am (UTC)I love you too.
~V~
Re: I love you Kat ~Veronica
on 2005-07-01 04:44 pm (UTC)~Sor
no subject
on 2004-06-03 02:54 pm (UTC)Oh wait. Forgot. He's gone now. Graduated. Dammit.
Damm you.
Couldn't wait another year? *sigh*
you know that i would if i could; and if you can tell me the times of the rehearsals i would be much obliged. (I still owe Mrs. Barry for George M, Starmites, Bill Shakespeare, and whatever Hammond did at our school)
Secondus: There's nothing wrong with having an ego bigger than zaphod's
Tertius: some of us are still children; every summer i get paid to make an utter and total fool of myself in front of witnesses! It is the most fun i have ever had and will ever have with some of the best people i have met in my life. You can join staff next year if you want. (To anyone else, join if you want to, the application is here (http://www.intandem.com/BAC/BCMSR/BCStaff.html). the cub scout camp is Oest and the boy scout ones are Saffran and Spencer (BTW: you don't need to be in boy scouts or girl scouts to join staff and paid positions at Oest start at age 15))