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Dec. 5th, 2018 10:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sorcyressSo I'm about three eighths of the way done with year two of the Dream Job.
I work close to ten hours a day on average. I have to get to work by like 6:45am if I want to get all my prepping done in time. I've got students who smoke enough pot that standing near them makes my eyes water. At least six of my students have some variety of Serious Bad Mental Shit, like the kind that takes them out of school for days at a time and makes them sad and sullen and withdrawn when they're back. I've hit fun new teacher milestones this year, like "help a student navigate having been sexually harassed by a classmate" and "be called a 'fucking cunt' to my face by a student laughing to his friends".
Oh, and I'm deeply panicked about the upcoming evidence file being due, and I'm constantly drowning in ungraded papers, and how do I deal with the number of students who are failing, anyways? Like, I know they're not coming to school, but is there something that I can do to make up for it??
I love my job _very much_. I haven't stopped loving my job, to any degree, not yet. I don't think I will anytime soon --there is nothing like teaching in the rest of the world, and it's such a delight to do.
But it's the kind of thing that eats time and eats brains and eats souls, and I have to remember that. I've been happier in the last year-and-three-eighths than I was for several years before that, but my stress and anxiety levels have been pretty damn high alongside it. I haven't seen most of my friends in two years (depression sucks), and I never feel like I've gotten enough sleep.
Still though, I wouldn't trade it. I hope you're able to find something that brings you joy.
~Sor
MOOP!
I work close to ten hours a day on average. I have to get to work by like 6:45am if I want to get all my prepping done in time. I've got students who smoke enough pot that standing near them makes my eyes water. At least six of my students have some variety of Serious Bad Mental Shit, like the kind that takes them out of school for days at a time and makes them sad and sullen and withdrawn when they're back. I've hit fun new teacher milestones this year, like "help a student navigate having been sexually harassed by a classmate" and "be called a 'fucking cunt' to my face by a student laughing to his friends".
Oh, and I'm deeply panicked about the upcoming evidence file being due, and I'm constantly drowning in ungraded papers, and how do I deal with the number of students who are failing, anyways? Like, I know they're not coming to school, but is there something that I can do to make up for it??
I love my job _very much_. I haven't stopped loving my job, to any degree, not yet. I don't think I will anytime soon --there is nothing like teaching in the rest of the world, and it's such a delight to do.
But it's the kind of thing that eats time and eats brains and eats souls, and I have to remember that. I've been happier in the last year-and-three-eighths than I was for several years before that, but my stress and anxiety levels have been pretty damn high alongside it. I haven't seen most of my friends in two years (depression sucks), and I never feel like I've gotten enough sleep.
Still though, I wouldn't trade it. I hope you're able to find something that brings you joy.
~Sor
MOOP!
no subject
on 2018-12-06 02:29 pm (UTC)You are the kind of teacher I was glad to have in high school, and that I want for all the kidlings in my life.
(and god damn I wish my favorite kidling had YOU for her math teacher, instead of the ass that she has to deal with, but ah well.)
I hope you get some socializing balance soon, and some sleep.