(no subject)
Sep. 12th, 2014 06:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sorcyressBoy, being absolutely swamped at work sure does make one forget their heartache. I had maybe twenty minutes of self-pity before my brain not-so-humbly suggested that if I actually wanted to have plans for my students today, I better get 'em done *pronto*. I so look forward to Monday, which seems likely to be a three-classes-three-quizzes day. Yes _please_, something light!
I managed to finish my A2H1 plans with about ten minutes to spare before the first class, used those ten minutes to throw together some actual presentation to frame the AdvMath2 class, and finished the AdvMath powerpoint while my first A2H class was busily working away. And then it was time to go over the A2H work, then hustle off to the next classroom for AdvMath, and after that I had a lovely hour respite in which I learned I'm going to be a para for two more classes (of mostly Spanish speakers, oh my dear gods), walked all the way to the other end of the school and back3 for no good reason, corrected the (minor!) errors I had found in the A2H lesson, filled in the attendance, and managed to read three whole pages of my book before it was time to teach my second A2H class.
After *that* I had two separate students from my A2H classes who didn't understand one whit of the word problem homeworks we've had recently, so I was at school an extra ninety minutes with them working through it all. And once I'd finished there, I felt completely justified in reading my damn book and forgetting about the world, because let's be real, it was an utter relief to be able to actually concentrate on the damn thing without getting distracted by my own real world problems (as happened yesterday afternoon to a sickening degree)
So I finished the novel, and cleared out from school at about six thirty, and it wasn't until I was biking home that I was given the brainspace to consider all the things that are awful about me and mine right now. No, I _really seriously_ don't want to talk about it. I'm not going to disable comments on this post, because I really do try to use that only rarely, but seriously, I haven't written publicly about it or talked to anyone about it, because I _emphatically don't want to_.
I'm doing fine right now, almost irreverent, even. I have a very strict eye to "all rules are suspended, you are on fucking brain vacation young person" (with the exception of my real-life _paying_ duties, alas), which means fantasy novels and quite plausibly ice cream at some point. There may be a visible aurora tonight, and maybe I will go investigate.
I don't have much else to say. Well, not here. My point from this morning stands somewhat, I am bone-achingly lonely right now, but in a way that doesn't remotely benefit from random offers from well meaning friends. I can assure you, if you could provide the precise thing I needed, I would ask for it. While different affections might be wonderfully distracting, distraction is not exactly what I'm looking for right now.
Right now, I just don't have the energy to be existent to anyone other than myself. I can't not shape myself to your desires, and so I'd really prefer not to even try and whoa is that a serious sentence holy shit stop reverberating quite so much, damn words!
I'll make that post next.
~Sor
MOOP!
1: Algebra 2 Honors
2: Advanced Math
3: And it is not a particularly small school I'm working at. I think from the math wing to Culinary arts is well longer than any point on the third floor of LRHS to the drama room.
PostScript: Yo, dude that has assured me in the past that he does not tell his wife about my LJ posts! Perhaps oddly, I am _way more concerned_ about you telling her about this one than the rest. Everything is fine, I will email her as soon as I am capable, I would just feel weird about her reading my casual reports. Thank you dearheart, and I hope you and yours are well!
I managed to finish my A2H1 plans with about ten minutes to spare before the first class, used those ten minutes to throw together some actual presentation to frame the AdvMath2 class, and finished the AdvMath powerpoint while my first A2H class was busily working away. And then it was time to go over the A2H work, then hustle off to the next classroom for AdvMath, and after that I had a lovely hour respite in which I learned I'm going to be a para for two more classes (of mostly Spanish speakers, oh my dear gods), walked all the way to the other end of the school and back3 for no good reason, corrected the (minor!) errors I had found in the A2H lesson, filled in the attendance, and managed to read three whole pages of my book before it was time to teach my second A2H class.
After *that* I had two separate students from my A2H classes who didn't understand one whit of the word problem homeworks we've had recently, so I was at school an extra ninety minutes with them working through it all. And once I'd finished there, I felt completely justified in reading my damn book and forgetting about the world, because let's be real, it was an utter relief to be able to actually concentrate on the damn thing without getting distracted by my own real world problems (as happened yesterday afternoon to a sickening degree)
So I finished the novel, and cleared out from school at about six thirty, and it wasn't until I was biking home that I was given the brainspace to consider all the things that are awful about me and mine right now. No, I _really seriously_ don't want to talk about it. I'm not going to disable comments on this post, because I really do try to use that only rarely, but seriously, I haven't written publicly about it or talked to anyone about it, because I _emphatically don't want to_.
I'm doing fine right now, almost irreverent, even. I have a very strict eye to "all rules are suspended, you are on fucking brain vacation young person" (with the exception of my real-life _paying_ duties, alas), which means fantasy novels and quite plausibly ice cream at some point. There may be a visible aurora tonight, and maybe I will go investigate.
I don't have much else to say. Well, not here. My point from this morning stands somewhat, I am bone-achingly lonely right now, but in a way that doesn't remotely benefit from random offers from well meaning friends. I can assure you, if you could provide the precise thing I needed, I would ask for it. While different affections might be wonderfully distracting, distraction is not exactly what I'm looking for right now.
Right now, I just don't have the energy to be existent to anyone other than myself. I can't not shape myself to your desires, and so I'd really prefer not to even try and whoa is that a serious sentence holy shit stop reverberating quite so much, damn words!
I'll make that post next.
~Sor
MOOP!
1: Algebra 2 Honors
2: Advanced Math
3: And it is not a particularly small school I'm working at. I think from the math wing to Culinary arts is well longer than any point on the third floor of LRHS to the drama room.
PostScript: Yo, dude that has assured me in the past that he does not tell his wife about my LJ posts! Perhaps oddly, I am _way more concerned_ about you telling her about this one than the rest. Everything is fine, I will email her as soon as I am capable, I would just feel weird about her reading my casual reports. Thank you dearheart, and I hope you and yours are well!
no subject
on 2014-09-15 11:18 am (UTC)This is good to know/be reminded of!