Writings...

[sorcyress]

I have been unusually talkative today, or rather, the thoughtstream has been unusually directed towards the elljay. Which is unusual --normally my day to day wanderings and thinkings are more Elsewhere based. Elsewhere being essentially the elaborate multilayered fanfics of my life. Although, lately it's all been so...mundane. I miss being a healer and fighting demons, or sneaking past the incompetent nazi's on my way to the park. Is this just another part of growing up --leaving the fantasy behind, and replacing it with the multitangled dramas that are interhuman relationships?

If so, I dislike the idea of growing up even more then before. I've been noting for a while now that the fantastical has ebbed from my mind, especially odd when one considers the prominence it used to hold. Rin is fading, and all the magic in the world can't protect her. She's the forgotten doll left behind in the toy box when her owner becomes too old for it.

...Dear gods no. No, no, no, no, NO! This is why I stick to Elsewhere, I don't have to face this sort of thing when I'm trawling it's shores or when I'm fiddling about in the lounge. Especially scary is the fact that this is something I wished upon myself, a fallen moment where I just wanted it all to go away. I could find it for you, I believe I gave it to Gabriel to protect, and he would be only too happy to help me spread my wings outside my walls.

...Fine. Here. Do not let it be said that I don't share my secrets ocassionally. I just need my mood to snap into just the right direction for it.

Ah, kung-fu time. I'll return later, I believe, and post all those thoughts. Or not. We'll see then, that's how life goes for me. And sometimes I really wish it wouldn't.

Love
~Sor
MOOP!

Comments

[jarne.livejournal.com]

M'dear, we need to have a bit of a chat about you leaving your fantasy world behind.

[astaereth.livejournal.com]

Ditto.

As for me, I learned a long time ago that fantasies are useless except as story material. All my daydreams and what-ifs get jotted down and tossed into the (mental or physical) file. What you write down leaves you, kid.

Also: I learned from reading Goosebump-y books as a child that if you don't properly get rid of imaginary friends, they get bitter and come back as evil supernatural beings, and at first you go along with their schemes because you miss them and feel guilty for killing them, and then it turns out they want to get rid of all the real friends you have now, so you have to fight them. And nobody wants that.

I think a good idea might be not just tossing them away, but writing them down. Make stories out of them, whatever, just get them out of your head and onto a piece of paper. There's a difference between just WISHING your fantasies away and properly, respectfully deciding to grow up. Hopefully you can make that decision, or else you'll spend your adult life in a straightjacket.

Love,
-Kyu