Bad Friday, okay Saturday
Mar. 30th, 2024 06:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sorcyressYesterday turned out horrible, and I got nothing done. (this is not quite true: I showered, and I finished reading Howl's Moving Castle, and I somehow managed to get 10/15 points on my dailies, but honestly, that's really just showing how baseline easy it should be for me to be getting 15/15 every damn day.)
But, as so often happens when I have a really shit day and do nothing but play video games the entire fucking day (whyyyyy), today has at least been a little bit better? If nothing else, I am in fact grounded from playing video games until I actually accomplish the short and reasonable todo list I had for yesterday and didn't do. This is annoying because then I find myself at loose brain ends and I have to force myself to just sit there and _be bored_ until I can come up with a non-video game concept of what to do.
I hate it so much. I hate how fucky and burnt-out my brain is that it's not actually easy to do this. Or I mean, it's plenty easy to come up with ideas, it's just the next thing to impossible to actually...do any of them. I could do grading! I have managed to do two out of eight gradings, and I am writing my words like six hours earlier than I normally do just to avoid doing another one. Earlier I laid on the floor for a minute or two to the same ends.
(Strictly speaking I am not grounded from reading books, but I don't necessarily want to go do that as my alternative, both because I am trying so hard to catch up on some actual productive shit and because I just...don't want to?)
I am listening to music. That's helping a lot with all the things, it was the one saving grace of yesterday that one big chunk of the not doing things was actually just spent watching a whole heap of YouTube videos. Going through all of ThingsWithWings's vids (soooo good!) and a whole bunch of the CKD dance vids (they're that group that _everyone_ has been linking to their Somebody I Used To Know choreography, which, to be clear, is phenomenal). That was good, and the listening to music part of it was very good.
I fucked up my music library --not catestrophically, although I have a little bit of renaming work that has to happen at some point, and I've lost all my playlists. Also Quod Libet keeps panicking about the very concept so if I try to open the playlist browser, it freezes up. Sigh. I genuinely didn't lose much --I haven't had proper playlist space since getting Melody, in 2020. But it's irritating that I can't make the player work properly. Maybe the right answer is a full reinstall?
Anyways, the upside is all my music is on my little external HD now, instead of my regular in-laptop drive. This is an important accomplishment because by "all my music" I mean "somewhere in the realm of 80GB". I haven't yet committed enough to [back up and] delete all the music from Melody but that's gonna happen soon, and then hopefully she'll work better in general?
Anyways. I probably have other things to babble about, but I should go do another grading instead. I hate this so much. Blah.
~Sor
MOOP!
But, as so often happens when I have a really shit day and do nothing but play video games the entire fucking day (whyyyyy), today has at least been a little bit better? If nothing else, I am in fact grounded from playing video games until I actually accomplish the short and reasonable todo list I had for yesterday and didn't do. This is annoying because then I find myself at loose brain ends and I have to force myself to just sit there and _be bored_ until I can come up with a non-video game concept of what to do.
I hate it so much. I hate how fucky and burnt-out my brain is that it's not actually easy to do this. Or I mean, it's plenty easy to come up with ideas, it's just the next thing to impossible to actually...do any of them. I could do grading! I have managed to do two out of eight gradings, and I am writing my words like six hours earlier than I normally do just to avoid doing another one. Earlier I laid on the floor for a minute or two to the same ends.
(Strictly speaking I am not grounded from reading books, but I don't necessarily want to go do that as my alternative, both because I am trying so hard to catch up on some actual productive shit and because I just...don't want to?)
I am listening to music. That's helping a lot with all the things, it was the one saving grace of yesterday that one big chunk of the not doing things was actually just spent watching a whole heap of YouTube videos. Going through all of ThingsWithWings's vids (soooo good!) and a whole bunch of the CKD dance vids (they're that group that _everyone_ has been linking to their Somebody I Used To Know choreography, which, to be clear, is phenomenal). That was good, and the listening to music part of it was very good.
I fucked up my music library --not catestrophically, although I have a little bit of renaming work that has to happen at some point, and I've lost all my playlists. Also Quod Libet keeps panicking about the very concept so if I try to open the playlist browser, it freezes up. Sigh. I genuinely didn't lose much --I haven't had proper playlist space since getting Melody, in 2020. But it's irritating that I can't make the player work properly. Maybe the right answer is a full reinstall?
Anyways, the upside is all my music is on my little external HD now, instead of my regular in-laptop drive. This is an important accomplishment because by "all my music" I mean "somewhere in the realm of 80GB". I haven't yet committed enough to [back up and] delete all the music from Melody but that's gonna happen soon, and then hopefully she'll work better in general?
Anyways. I probably have other things to babble about, but I should go do another grading instead. I hate this so much. Blah.
~Sor
MOOP!
no subject
on 2024-03-31 01:11 am (UTC)