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Feb. 2nd, 2015 02:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sorcyressI am extremely service-oriented. This is not just in a kink sense (although that is no small part of my kink orientation), I have known for years and years and years that my existence is based around the idea of Making Other People's Lives Easier.
(In fact, that may be another Truth --I have been considering them, since that post about sex and desirability. This makes five. I will post about the other three sometime soon.)
I just realized that this can be a formidable tool against my stupidbrain, when it is not motivating properly. See, motivation is one of the hardest damn things I have. I can't do things for myself!
But what if I can do things for other people?
I was standing in the kitchen, doing the standard "I should eat cooking is hard food is impossible" thing, and had to go upstairs for a moment to talk to Joseph (moving laundry along). While up there, my brain gave me a sharp kick and I asked if he'd had lunch yet and offered to make something.
Making food for someone else, that's easy to motivate! Joseph is hungry! If I feed him, I will Make His Life Easier! There is almost no trouble at all acting upon those impulses. And if I so happen to accidentally make myself lunch in the process (not to mention do some chat-cleaning1 of the kitchen while I'm at it...)
Yesssss, good. Stupid brain! I can trick it into doing things for myself by expanding them to be for other people as well! It's the opposite of Infinite Darlene2! MUAHHAHA!
I am pleased by this power over myself.
~Sor
MOOP!
1: Is there a better word for this? I do a lot of cleaning when I am standing around talking to people in my house. I don't think of it as nervous or shame based, it's just...I am standing around talking, I like to keep my body in activity, here is an activity I can do. For lack of anything else, I'm gonna call it chatcleaning.
2: Infinite Darlene is from Boy Meets Boy, which is my favourite love story. My favourite quote of her: "She seems very full of herself. Which she is. It's only after you get to know her better that you realize that somehow she's managed to encompass all her friends within her own self-image, so that when she's acting full of herself, she's actually full of her close friends, too."
(In fact, that may be another Truth --I have been considering them, since that post about sex and desirability. This makes five. I will post about the other three sometime soon.)
I just realized that this can be a formidable tool against my stupidbrain, when it is not motivating properly. See, motivation is one of the hardest damn things I have. I can't do things for myself!
But what if I can do things for other people?
I was standing in the kitchen, doing the standard "I should eat cooking is hard food is impossible" thing, and had to go upstairs for a moment to talk to Joseph (moving laundry along). While up there, my brain gave me a sharp kick and I asked if he'd had lunch yet and offered to make something.
Making food for someone else, that's easy to motivate! Joseph is hungry! If I feed him, I will Make His Life Easier! There is almost no trouble at all acting upon those impulses. And if I so happen to accidentally make myself lunch in the process (not to mention do some chat-cleaning1 of the kitchen while I'm at it...)
Yesssss, good. Stupid brain! I can trick it into doing things for myself by expanding them to be for other people as well! It's the opposite of Infinite Darlene2! MUAHHAHA!
I am pleased by this power over myself.
~Sor
MOOP!
1: Is there a better word for this? I do a lot of cleaning when I am standing around talking to people in my house. I don't think of it as nervous or shame based, it's just...I am standing around talking, I like to keep my body in activity, here is an activity I can do. For lack of anything else, I'm gonna call it chatcleaning.
2: Infinite Darlene is from Boy Meets Boy, which is my favourite love story. My favourite quote of her: "She seems very full of herself. Which she is. It's only after you get to know her better that you realize that somehow she's managed to encompass all her friends within her own self-image, so that when she's acting full of herself, she's actually full of her close friends, too."