To me, the idea of "love" kind of equates with choosing one person over all others, including yourself. To say that you choose two or ten or twenty thousand people over everyone else really isn't saying much about any or either of them.
Polygamy, I can wrap my mind around. Anyone can get married. I can understand being conflicted between a few people. But to say, "Heck with it, I'll just pick all of them" seems selfish and lazy and dishonest. Selfish because you're putting your desires for sex/cuddling/Deep Conversation/whatever over the people you supposedly "love," who are forced to share you. Lazy because you can't be fucked to figure out what you really want. And dishonest because you're telling each of your "significant" others that they are Special and Unique Snowflakes meant for You, you're telling yourself that each of them is Equal to the others.
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ninetydegrees
Re: This is my taking a deep breath comment.
on 2009-01-23 04:16 am (UTC)Polygamy, I can wrap my mind around. Anyone can get married. I can understand being conflicted between a few people. But to say, "Heck with it, I'll just pick all of them" seems selfish and lazy and dishonest. Selfish because you're putting your desires for sex/cuddling/Deep Conversation/whatever over the people you supposedly "love," who are forced to share you. Lazy because you can't be fucked to figure out what you really want. And dishonest because you're telling each of your "significant" others that they are Special and Unique Snowflakes meant for You, you're telling yourself that each of them is Equal to the others.
It degrades everyone involved.