sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Before I talk about the actual character for today, I need to talk about a half-character. So, let me introduce you to Green-Eyed Sue

Sue gets about twelve lines, in the last third of s00j's three part Wendy Trilogy (which picks up when Wendy is on Hook's ship and told to turn pirate or walk the plank --"the story goes she told him no, but not all tales are true").

One day Wendy says to Peter, "I'd like more girls on my crew."
So Peter goes a-hunting Lost Girls and brings back Green-eyed Sue.

Green Eyed Sue was feisty, quite surly and quite sad
called Suzy Rotten by her mum and tomboy by her dad.
At the chance to be a pirate and call Peter Pan a friend,
Her face lit up, her sadness fled, and she ne'er looked home again.
She proudly followed Wendy, and she ne'er went home again.

Sue becomes first mate, as she's the first Lost Girl to live upon
the ship and give to Wendy all the spirit she can give.

and then, after Wendy declares she's ready to go home...

Nearly all the crew let Wendy know they cannot wait
But stoic stand a handful, including the first mate.
Green-eyed Sue before her captain asks to plainly speak her mind:
"It's sooner I'd lay down my life than leave this ship behind!"

"A simple life of growing up is surely not for me.
Working as a sailor's been the first time I am free.
So by your leave dear Captain, I will be a pirate still
And carry on the legacy of our Red-handed Jill!"

and as a lesson, at the very end...

Such warning fables show each mom and dad a thing or two.
If e'er your sweetling makes a cutlass from a cardboard tube,
You'll ne'er berate nor tell her it's a boy's game she pursues.
The freer that you raise a mind, the brighter it will bloom,
And ye'd rather have her home than off to join some scurvy crew

Or sail with the likes of Green-eyed Sue!

Ohhhhhh yes. Thankfully, I was blessed with parents who wouldn't dream of telling me that playing pirate was a boy's game (not when Commodore Greykell rules the Chesapeake Bay), so I never had to go off and become a Lost Girl proper, but trust me, the freedom of the sea has called to me longer than most anything else. I was already well into the pirate theme when the original Pirates of the Caribbean movie came out --you can keep your x-wings, boys, I've got a different sort of ship to sail1.

And at the end, that's the line I need. "First time I've been free" --freedom is my life force, my desire, my need. Everything from my love life to my collection of notebooks echo and reflect on my endless drive to be forever free.

So that's Green-Eyed Sue. But she's not really a character, she's only a few lines in a song2. Not like, say...

Mary "Bloody Jacky" Faber.

There are 12 books in her saga --the last of which I have not yet read3-- and they are some of the finest young adult literature I've ever had the pleasure of consuming. In the first book (Bloody Jack: Being An Account of the Curious Adventures of Mary “Jacky” Faber, Ship’s Boy), we follow Jacky as she sneaks onto a ship of the Royal Navy as a ship's boy --doubly complex since she's every inch a fiery young woman. Her series of books is some of the finest historical fiction tall tales there are to read --she rubs shoulders with Goya, Napoleon, Washington, and King George at various points. She sails the seas of China and all the way down the Mississippi, she sings and dances and acts, and she sails on every ship imaginable --navy, slavers, whalers, pirate.

Please read these books, they are so so good.

But the thing that makes them the most good is the spitfire heroine, who me. So *very* me. Even for this project, she is *exceptionally* me. Jacky is impulsive, she doesn't always think her plans through, instead trusting in her ability to improvise her way out of anything. She loves the sea, she loves her *freedom* and she's forever moving towards it. She somehow manages to inspire an overwhelming loyalty in her friends and loved ones, even when she frustrates them madly. And the flirting! Oh, the flirting!!

She is the first YA character I've ever seen who I actually had a stake in her love triangle. Mostly because Jacky's got her true love forever (and she is, of course, saving her precious maidenhood for dear Jaimy), but when he's not around, she's more than willing to have a little bit of fun with the closest bit of pretty...and not just pretty boys! It's pretty clear in a couple of them that she's willing to snuggle up with other young ladies (and I stubbornly maintain the interpretation that her and Cheng Shih were lovers, it's increasingly un-subtle as the series progresses...and yes, that is Cheng Shih as in the greatest pirate queen of all time.)

And her dreams! Oh, Jacky dreams big and wide and splendid! Somewhere around book five or six I took a step back and said "okay, this is too much suspension of disbelief that a character could have all these things happen." And then I checked my damn brain, and reprocessed and went "ah. These are tall tales. She is a folklore heroine, and therefore *of course* she's going to hang with everyone famous of the day." She has such brilliant adventures, from singer to spy, and throughout it all she's going back and forth with her costuming as to whether she wants to present as a girl or a boy. She's not presented as a trans character, not really, but she is presented as a female character who actively *wants* to spend a lot of time dressed as a boy, and not because she "has" to, and that's a very satisfying kind of queer for me to read about.

I love Jacky Faber like fire and earth. I'm probably due for another read through of her books.

I'm going to post this before it gets any longer. Yo-ho, yo-ho, a pirate's life for me!


1: Actually, I am one thousand percent in favour of space pirates. Someone has a little meta-fanfic they wrote for Captain Jack Sparrow and the second great Age of Exploration (which has not yet happened), and it's perfect.

2: ACTUALLY apparently she's also s00j. Like, s00j was called Susie Rotten and everything. There are some substantial reasons why I don't wanna compare myself one way or another to Ms. Tucker (although I will always feel a weird twinge looking at the cover of Tangles because UM THAT'S ME in the drawing. Most of the drawings of her don't twitch that in me, but that one, man.

3: For much the same reason I've never read Dirk Gently. LA Meyer passed away a couple years ago (may the sea keep his soul), and once I've read the last Jacky book there will never be any more, not ever. It hurts too much to consider. Someday, just not yet.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Today I'm gonna cheat and talk about two characters, right in a row, who come from the same sort of movie but are very different people. But I see myself in both of them, at least a little.

Put on your blonde and head to the valley, because we're totally talking about Cher Horowitz, from Clueless! (Don't feel bad if you didn't recognize the last name, I had to look it up too.)

Look, on the surface, Cher and I appear to be absolutely nothing alike. In the immortal words of Wicked, I am unusually1 and exceedingly peculiar and all together quite impossible to describe, and she is Blonde. But there's more to us both than the surface.

Cher is a little aimless and a little vain. She wants to do great things and help people, but she doesn't exactly know how. When things start going bad for her, her first impulse is to indulge in some retail therapy --oh sure, half the clothes I wears, she wouldn't touch (and vice versa), but both of us know the value of a good outfit on a bad mood.

Her projects often start from a self-serving place, but they are intended to help people. She listens, and tries to empathize (even with people she normally wouldn't socialize with), and she just wants everyone to be their happy, cute, best self. Oh, and she's a virgin who can't drive2.

Perhaps Cher exhibits more of my bad traits than my good, but I still can't help but see myself reflected in her ambition some days --and both of us tend to aim that ambition at places other than expected. That being said, I did successfully argue at least one quarter of 12th grade psychology from a B to an A, because I felt I should. I don't know if my parents were proud --and I don't know if they wouldn't've been prouder if I'd earned it myself.


Now while we're talking about blonde girls from the nineties, we would be utterly remiss in continuing the conversation if we didn't take a step by Katarina Stratford.

It is _so rare_ that I meet other Katarinas, let alone ones that spell their name the same as I do. So of course I took attention when I learned there was such a person in 10 Things I Hate About You. It's Julia Stiles's best role, and if you haven't seen the movie, I can't recommend it enough.

And is Katarina Stratford a similar Kat to me? Oh yes. Ohhhhhhh yes. Admittedly, I hardly ever got called into the guidance office for inducing men to kick themselves into the balls (Bobby Ridgeway deserved it, I'm sure) but I've spent the last few years honing my sharpness into something useful and dangerous. Sarcasm is a language I've always spoken, and she uses it *well*.

My parents joked once or twice about inflicting the "you can't date 'til she does" rule on me and Alys --it proved unnecessary all around (since my parents are basically cool people), but I know what it's like to have the total babe younger sister. Who I would do anything to protect, even if I don't always know how to show it.

And I know what it's like to crave independence so hard you'll run a thousand miles away to find it. I love my parents, they are really wonderful people, but I have wanted to be free of anyone else's influence since I was about twelve years old.

All that and Heath Ledger in his prime. Sign me up!


1: Completely unrelated to anything else, I like how the first three vowels in this words are all "u's". "unusually"! It has a nice type-feel to it!

2: This line hits me so hard, every time. I'm not a virgin anymore3, but I was for longer than some of my friends, and I still have all the weird and complicated around traditional intercourse. And I drive much *much* more safely than Cher does --I've never gotten into an accident, never gotten a speeding/etc ticket, or anything like that. But it still doesn't come naturally (except on the liminal spaces of highway road trips, at which point I can access magic) and I often have just a little feeling of discomfort. And heck, I didn't get my license until I was nineteen.

3: *jams out to appropriate Poe song here*
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)

By which I mean I am the world's huuuuugest wuss and so of *course* I'ma watch the horror tv series alone, at night, in a rainstorm with lots of creepy wind effects outside the house, in the dark, in a house that's not mine so is technically even creepier!

Also the set up of the TV and the windows and curtains means that I occasionally spot the reflection of the TV in the window to my right, just out of the corner of my eye, and it's just...*shivers* Noooooo. No random little whisps of movement, please and thank you.

I'm quite enjoying it! I should do this to myself more often, ideally with even creepier media! Theoretically, that's what I've done gradually over time with creepypastas. Now I hardly ever get creeped out when I read a hundred scary stories in a row HAHAHAH THAT IS A TOTAL LIE YEP.

(Actually, I haven't been reading all that much horror fiction lately. My quiet steady binges of r/nosleep and r/shortscarystories have shifted over almost entirely to r/unresolvedmysteries which is horror *non*fiction. And sometimes not-horror. To be perfectly honest, I'm most excited about the non-horror threads, just because the endless press of missing persons and unidentified bodies makes one weary.

((to say nothing of Jon-Benet Ramsey. Can we just...not? I'm really not keen on her. FWIW on other big mysteries: EAR/ONS = fascinating because serial killers, Maura Murray = died in the woods because Vermont in winter, Elisa Lam = I'm so so sorry that people are trying to make you supernatural because you don't deserve a harder death than you already had in life.))

But yes, The Max Headroom Incident is awwwwwesome, and I ought to go see for reals some Tonybee tiles sometime.)


I am four episodes in and entirely happy about it all. I like...pretty much every character thread, which is a fascinating thing to have happen in an ensemble piece. Obviously, the kids and Eleven are the best-best-best, but Jonathan is exactly my kind of awkward weird eye-candy (STOP JUDGING OKAY. HE WAS TOPLESS BRIEFLY, AND IT WAS GOOD), and Nancy is *also* suitable eye-candy (as well as completely understandable to me, even though that's not who I was in high school), and I don't hate the sheriff (which is shocking), and oh gods, Joyce is so perfectly tragic. IT'S A GOOD SHOW, IT TURNS OUT!

There are not many jump scares. Instead, I just start twitching every third scene or so, knowing that something awful is coming.

I'm probably not going to watch any more tonight --it is after one in the morning, and I shouldn't encourage myself to do terrible things with my body and sleep schedule-- but I look forward to powering through and finishing the series tomorrow. I am...not likely to read LJ until after I've finished, because spoilers.

(I am entirely indifferent about spoilers for things, until I am actively and rapidly consuming the thing at which point NO NO SPOILERS TELL ME FUCKING NOTHING! And I mean, if I could avoid knowing the length of episodes or how long they are (or how many pages I am from the end of a book) I'd take that too. Nothing objective or subjective, damnit!)

I have nothing else useful to say. If you haven't seen it, have Netflix, and like horror, you should go watch it sometime!

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
((Yes, I'm jumping back to eight. We'll see how many more I manage to crank out over the next ten days. Maybe all of them!))

Clifford B. Hicks has a character named Alvin Fernald, who has all sorts of books and goes on all sorts of adventures. And I think Wabbit would likely write about The Pest, if she knew of these books. (A girl desperate to be thought of as a boy, to be able to do fun things with her brother and his friends).

I like The Pest too. And I like Alvin (and though my brain never quite ran the right directions, I always *wanted* to be an inventor.) But what I like most of all --and who I relate to most of all, after a weird moment of thought, is Shoie.

Shoie is not The Magnificent Brain. He's the best friend, the follower. But he's also the incredibly physical one, who burns off energy by walking on his hands or along fences. Maybe it's the ADHD, maybe it's just my own weird quirk, but I've almost always been a fairly physical person. I used to go regular with the high school gang to play blind tag at the playground, and once there, I was one of the ones balancing on the monkey bars with my eyes closed and trying to make the Leap of Faith from the slide to the entrance of the structure. Nowadays, I sublimate a lot of my "need to MOVE" into dance, but I still climb up and walk on walls instead of the sidewalk some days.

Shoie is caring and supportive of Alvin, helping him out of (and sometimes into!) scrapes. He's a good dude, all around, and I'd like to think I am able to be that friendly and that loyal. But most of all, I know full well that neither of us would be happy to live our lives sitting down.

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Meant to write this down this morning, spent quite a bit of time sleeping through my alarm(s) instead. Well done, self.

Dream fragment: I am sitting in a chair, wearing my princess robe and nothing else. My robe is open, and I am curled up, reading a book. I am not at all concerned that I am mostly naked.

A man (who had been blocking my way with a large van, causing me to choose and sit and curl up? Who was some kind of workman, or claimed to be some kind of workman? These are early-dream details and I don't remember them) pointed his phone at me, briefly, while I was reading. I looked up in time to catch him trying to put it away in a pocket, and understood with a sudden nasty shock that he had been taking a picture of me.

The man is well bigger than I am --my waking impression was "Huh, that was Victor Dubenich1 but grimier and sleazier2" but I basically get up and shove into him, grabbing the hand holding the phone before he can put it away and clamping down. At which point I demand, without sweetness, that he go into his photo album and delete those photos, now.

He tries to fake me out (including trying to go into the ebay app, maybe to convince me that the only photos he's taken recently are of something mechanical he wants to sell?) but scrolls through his phone and eventually gets to the right app. He seems quite scared of me, even though I'm half his size and underdressed --he tried bluffing that he didn't have any photos, but I clamp down harder, digging my nails into the side of his thumb, and it is revealed that he has, in fact, taken four creepshots of me. I may have threatened to punch him in the head, or murder him, or something in between. I don't recall exactly.

I woke up right after confirming that he had the photos, so I didn't get resolution that he'd deleted them, but I've no doubt they'll be gone. And if he didn't make them gone, my dreamself would've quite ended him.

It was a very empowering dream! I like that kind of creeper-dream, where I am in full command of myself and I will destroy you for damaging me.


1: Okay, fine, Saul Rubinek, except I'm sure Saul's a totally nice Hollywood guy, and Dubenich is a classic -*the* classic- Leverage asshole villain. I definitely don't wish to tar him by my dream filling him in for "eh, kinda scummy working class dude?"

Unrelatedly, apparently Saul Rubinek played the rabbi in "Oy Vey! My Son is Gay!!", which I have never heard of and _must watch_ because what? Thank you IMDB.

2: This word very much feels like it should be spelled sleeze instead. Sleeze just feels/looks sleazier than sleaze.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Biking through Medford (which seriously, of all the little townships around here, Medford is definitely the one with the most shouty-assholes in it...and it is *not* where I spend most my time!) and I come up to a T intersection. I'm on the part going straight, with a blinking yellow "yield" light. There is a road that goes off to my right.

I slow, because there's a truck turning from the lane going towards me into the road-to-my-right. Then I go on through the intersection, because that's how bikes and roads and "yield" works.

As I pass the turn-off road, a man shouts at me from behind "LOOK BOTH WAYS!". A quick glance shows he is in a pickup truck, that has turned from my lane into the road-to-the-right, and he is glaring at me.

And just...what? Like seriously there, what? I have gotten the occasional fair criticism before1, although not often since I am pretty good at following rules of the road2. But what on *earth* was he trying to get me to do? I was going straight. I was going straight through an intersection. I looked to make sure the other road didn't have a car coming. I didn't look the other way to check if there was a car coming from there because there was a sidewalk and houses and I'm not really keen on that sort of weird paranoia.

My only guess is that he wanted to cut me off by turning right directly in front of me, and was angry that I didn't look behind me and see that he was signaling his turn. not my job? Like, if he had pulled up beside me (which he technically legally couldn't do, there wasn't a bike lane there, although the road was mostly wide enough), I probably would've been aware of his presence and might've glanced to check for a turn signal. But mostly, I was focused on going straight, legally, through the yellow flashing light.

My only other guess is that he's some kind of time traveler or something, and this was the quickest way he could think to impart a grave warning. So I suppose, for the immediate future, I will be looking both ways. But still probably only when it makes sense according to the street layout.

Fuggin cars3, man.


1: I'm still a little annoyed at the pedestrian, who I gave space to and waited for them to cross the street in front of me, who turned and snidely informed me that "red lights are for bikes too." Yeah, jerk. I know I ran the red. Because when there's a pedestrian light (and I am aware of pedestrians and let them have right of way, like I clearly was) it is safer for me to get through the intersection and out of the way, than try to play "who can accelerate faster!" with the cars. He was technically right, but clearly doesn't actually understand realistic expectations or logistics of bicycles and I wouldn't be so miffed, months later, if I hadn't first made a point of giving him space.

2: I'm not a speed demon and I don't run red lights *unless* I have the aforementioned pedestrian walk light. And I look out for cars turning right when I do. But I don't go the wrong way down one-ways, and I wear my helmets and my reflective-vest and my lights and I am about as safe as a bicyclist can be in this city.

3: I find myself occasionally amused/fascinated by my disconnect between "cars" and "drivers". I am much more likely to impart blame to the former category, which is ridiculous, as they're just dumb animals following directions. The car is not the one doing anything wrong, and yet...


Oct. 17th, 2016 05:35 am
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Apparently when the heat gets turned on, my room gets amazingly warm.

Like, I woke up (admittedly after having slept next to Sparr, who is the warmest boyfriend) and was just lying there on the bed, sweating and unable to cool down. I'm really quite impressed!

Anyways, here are some things that have happened since the last time I actually managed to write my words:

*I came home from the wedding! Yayyyy for visiting Kateface, for late night drives, and for hitting up all the rest stops for Munzees! (Of course, I shared my meager accomplishments with mom who retaliated by pointing out that she'd had a 14k day. There are some small advantages to living in Texas, and being near the start of Munz is one of them.)

*I spent Columbus Day doing basically nothing. I think my total sum accomplishments were bringing my luggage inside from the car. Not unpacking or anything, just physically bringing the bags up to my room. This was not great, but I do deserve an emotional day of rest, right?

*I was hit with the most exhausting and draining cold I have had in a *long* time. This involved a significant amount of snot coming out of my face (Ughhhhhhh) and an equally significant amount of sleeping. Just...most of what I've been doing for the last week is sleeping as much as possible while still going to work.

*Then on Thursday! Thursday when the cold was basically peaking, in terms of misery! Thursday when I went nannying for Rbeast! I finished nannying and found that my parked bicycle had been smashed all to bloody hell and just UGHHHHHHHH. I am unthrilled.

(Okay, so, the back wheel is unusable, but the frame might have escaped damage --I'm going to take a closer look today, and send all the relevant photos and stuff to my mechanic.

Also, I called my renter's insurance to be all "I know you don't handle this but..." and their response was "no, actually, that's a hundred percent what we handle." So that part's good. Either my bike will be less damaged than my $250 deductible, at which point I may choose not to use insurance and may do just in case of other emergency, or my bike will be smashed way the fuck over my deductible (if there is serious frame damage) at which point USAA is buying me a new bike, and that's pretty kind of them.

Yeah. Fucking hit and run car assholes can rot.

*Anywho, I have not yet called my mechanic in part because I know damn well he's off camping in the woods in Connecticut this weekend, but mostly because late Thursday night...Sparr arrived!! He's been visiting all weekend for what is probably the most chill weekend we've had together since we lived in the same place. It's been just days of stretching out alongside and atop each other, playing video games and chatting and showing each other things.

That's a thing I miss a lot. I miss the sex, and I miss the body warmth from sleeping alone (although see above note about having awesome insulation in this house --although we'll see if it's the same effectiveness when I am not leaving the door closed full time to keep the cat out) and I miss a million little things --I miss him, certainly-- but I miss just having someone around to be easy with, to do parallel play with while cuddling. I should cuddle my roommates more, Laura doesn't seem adverse to physical touch and Triona encourages it.

We went out for lunch on Saturday and ice cream on Sunday, we hung with a handful of people I quite like and don't get to see much (Kas! Al!), and Saturday night we went candlepin bowling --me for the very first time. This involved hanging out in a completely different social setting with a sometimes work-friend of mine (who has a secret different name when he's doing this sort of thing that I don't always remember). It was cool! I suck at candlepin, but not any worse than I do typical bowling, and my arms hurt less the next day. (Managed to substantially twinge my left hip though...)

This weekend I also met a nice woman going through a shitty time who is going to be our new housemate --it sucks that she is dealing with a separation/divorce, but weirdly convenient that it's happening just after Triona decides to scramble.

So that's me! Feeling better, and able to start throwing myself back into doing my habitica tasks and the like. Tuesday upcoming is the Boring Dance Meeting, and speaking of dance, I have to program November and December's beginner classes and social hours.

Be well, friends!


(postscript: I have not forgotten about the character meme, and do plan to get back to it and maybe even catch up on the backlog. Just...not tonight.)
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
So, I am a little bit tipsy right now, because pre-wedding party involved doing origami and drinking good scotch! Whee! I drank lots of scotch for me! This was probably a terrible idea, but I am safely locked in my hotel room and drinking lots of water so MEH.

Anyways, in honor, I need a bar character, and the bar character I am most like is definitely DEFINITELY Mary Callahan-Finn. Gawdamn, right?

I mean, I'm not nearly as fucking awesome as she is --no blacksmithing here! But I am at least into fields that aren't usually lady-fied, and I like her sense of humour and mellowness and share a freaky fetish for super-tall, super-skinny lads. Also for freaky alien dudes full of Weird. Yesplease, xenophillia!

But let's be real here, the reason I'd like to compare myself to anyone at Callahan's Crosstime Saloon is not because they get to encounter aliens or time travelers or talking dogs. It's because they get to encounter _people_. Real people, as warm and real and honest and wonderful as you can find, and then they take those people and care for 'em, as hard as they possibly can. There's something to be said about that whole shared pain and joy thing1, and damn if it's not one of the most important things out there.

Mary takes the world and she looks at the problems it has and she tries to find solutions. She knows things are tough and harsh and weird sometimes, but she doesn't see that as any sort of excuse. She's wonderful and warm and funny with a sharp wit and clever hands. Hell yes!


1: "Shared pain is halved, shared joy is doubled"
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
I just finished packing for a wedding in which I'll be wearing white-tie formalwear, so I need a dandy character for today. Which is easy: Gomez Addams!

Ages ago, I used to watch the cartoon version of the Addams family, and more recently, I have fallen in absolute love with the movie. A lot of that is because of Gomez and how utterly _perfect_ he is. He may be less a character who I am like and more a character I *want* to be like!

He is unbelievably loving. He cares, deeply, passionately, and lustfully for his wife. He wants nothing more than to make her happy, ideally by making her incredibly pained. He cannot resist her beauty --there's an impulsiveness there that I have in common with close partners, where I just want to be able to touch them and love them all the time.

He loves his children, too, and genuinely supports their activities. He wants them to succeed and is encouraging and gleeful as they do it.

He is _fun_. Business comes *after* pleasure, and pleasure takes the form of flips and swordfights! He's in the kind of beautiful shape that I strive to achieve, a man who can dance the MAMUSHKA! without breaking a sweat.

And hell yes, he is dapper. In the morning, he's wearing silk pyjamas and a dressing gown, to work, an expertly tailored vest and slacks. He understands the importance of looking your best, and his best is *devestatingly* handsome.

I could have worse role models, no? What's a little gothic destruction between friends. ;)

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Today's been shit and busy and I haven't had much a chance to actually Get Things Done on the computer (I have spent some time on the computer fucking around, and I did get my errands done, so I can't be quite as upset as I would be otherwise.)

At any rate, have a fairly quick character: The Luidaeg.

(Most often when I'm sketching her, I'll refer to her as Annie, but it feels way way WAY too informal to do so in writing, and I don't want her to eat my heart or turn me into a tree. So Luidaeg it is, and apparently it's pronounced Lou-sha-k. Which means one of these days I'm going to get around to writing a filk about her set to Love Shack, which is the worst thing ever)

The Luidaeg is from Seanan McGuire's Toby Daye books. She's powerful as all get out, the San Francisco Sea Witch. Because of the nature of this particular series, going too deep into character details would certainly count as spoilerish, but we can do a good surface probe.

She's immortal (and _old_). She's almost perpetually cranky. She is unfailingly honest. She is powerful-powerful-POWERFUL! Her bedroom is full of fishtanks with monsters, and her house is full of cockroaches. She really likes ice cream and eats a lot of it. Given an assumed infinite ability to control her appearance, she chooses to present as a nineteen year old girl with pigtails, freckles, and overalls.

She's unbelievably sad inside, lonely and alone and not broken but empty.

She is not always nice to Toby, but nice doesn't necessarily get things done. The Luidaeg is as competent as she can be within the span of her (oft ritualized, and questions come in threes) limitations, and she's the sort of independent that makes me whimper with want.

She's not my every day. But on bad days, it's nice to know that there are characters who can be Good --or at least, as close to Good as we get in a faerie that doesn't recognize human morality-- while not being happy or nice. I love the Toby books. The Luidaeg is a _huge_ part of that love.

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Trigger Warning: Emotional/sexual assault

Honestly, it's been a pretty shit day. I got triggered -hard- in Davis earlier. Like, just standing next to the 9/11 memorial with tears pouring down my face. Because Davis Square is doing The Clothesline Project.

This is, if you've been reading this livejournal for a long time, or otherwise have all the pieces, how I figured out that I had been raped. I had one year of college where the April t-shirts were a tragic thing that didn't have anything to do with me, and then the next year where I walked past them and Understood. My senior year of college, I was able to make my own.

I feel incredibly strongly and positively about this project. But wow, I was not expecting to be slapped across the face with them suddenly appearing in the middle of October, in the middle of the square. I've never seen an installation off a college campus.

So yeah. Walking across the square, spotting the t-shirts strung up in the main part and just freezing. I wouldn't say my stomach dropped, but the sense of Self I keep behind my sternum just completely curled in around my spine. It almost hurt physically, seeing that and remembering.

I went over and paid tribute, because that's what I do. And then I turned and left without talking to the organizers or learning about the domestic violence vigil that was apparently held tonight. Chasing away the pain went relatively quickly, this time. I went to the library, held myself together enough to get my books, and pulled up an old sonnet to recite over and over as I walked. Between the fact that it actually has a good cadence to it, and that performing is a good distraction (and distraction is all I'm ever looking for), I got my brain back on track. I was even well enough to recite it for a video for y'all.

All that aside, it was a nasty surprise to be cold-cocked triggered like that. I have been scarring (I have been lucky?) and while it comes to mind with relative frequency, I haven't been doing the hard-freeze-and-interrupt version of Remembering My Sexual/Emotional Abuse. Usually I do a long soft sad, or a "I'm not actually upset about this, but the conversation has led to a reference" thing.

(I feel weird that my reaction is so often the latter, mostly because I feel like it makes other people uncomfortable that I can treat my rape casually. Like, I'm sorry that I've put in ten thousand words and like eight years of healing, but that's how it goes. Thing happened. It's in my history now. It'll come up sometimes. Get over it please? Being awkward and sad and Requiring Comfort is not your job.)

So yeah. At least my quick search of the internet indicates they won't be there tomorrow. I should be fine even if they are, the visceral hit is over. But whee, huzzah for triggers I don't even realize.


Trigger Warning: Emotional/sexual assault
sorcyress: Sketch of me wearing one of Zaphod's outfits from the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy movie (Zaph-me)
Characters I relate to day 4: The how did I not put this as day 1, seriously? The one, the only, the (no seriously, thank god he's the only how would we cope otherwise) Zaphod Beeblebrox I.

With this, we must confront one of the traits that keeps popping up: I relate to characters who are ridiculously self-assured. Not necessarily arrogant, but completely aware of and comfortable with who and what they are. Zaphod is the pinnacle of the trope --I own a button that says "I survived the Total Perspective Vortex" because just as he did, I would. I have no trouble believing that I am one hoopy frood.

Zaphod actually served as a denizen for a time --maybe two years? was he around before Hyde1?-- which means he lurked in the back of my head and mixed drinks. He left sometime during college, which is okay --there's only so much ego my brainspace can hold, and it's better that his and mine never had to formally clash. Gods, I love that man's ego.

Zaphod is the worst-dressed sentient being in the universe. He has won this award _seven times_. Do you better understand my extensive and elaborate wardrobe if I point out that I am naturally Zaphodic in nature? True, my personal style has been sophisticating these past few months2, but my aesthetic appreciation will never stop trending towards "god that looks heinous...I love it!"

Besides the ego...well, okay, in some ways there's not a lot to Zaphod but the ego, but besides the ego, Zaphod has a BIG personality. He doesn't waste time with little piddling dreams --he's going to become president of the galaxy and steal a really keen ship. He's impulsive and mischievous and the best bang since the big one. I can't drink for arse, but besides that, I think he'd approve of me.

Zaphod Beeblebrox: The first character I've mentioned who I'd date, as well as be. Oh, and in case you were wondering, heads are side by side, third arm is basically always visible, and he's blonde. And yes, eyepatch. So, mostly miniseries, but with certain aspects of the movie. I'll sketch a picture tomorrow, I hope. In the meantime, you can go ahead and look at stuff I drew about ten years ago.


1: And yes, Hyde will definitely show up at some point, although it'll be interesting because he's around since I *don't* relate to him. Sorta.

2: NYFF was the first time I felt like my personal aesthetic style really perfectly clicked. It's been trending upwards from there. My slow descent into nothing but pumpkin colours full time all the time has been very helpful in this regard.

Postscript: If you're viewing this entry on dreamwidth, you're seeing an icon of me wearing a movie-zaphod outfit, drawn by mek aaaaaages ago. I got the original recently, I should scan and post it --it's me and Zaph arm in arm. Zaphod has a juicebox because...our collective canon for our respective headmates was weird, okay?
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
More fictional characters! Today we have one near and dear to my heart, who I was reminded of when I was thinking about cosplay yesterday. That's right, we're looking at my fourth grade Halloween costume, Pippilotta Delicatessa Windowshade Mackrelmint Ephraim's Daughter Longstocking!

(You can probably call her Pippi, for short. I certainly will!)

Pippi Longstocking is the strongest little girl in the world. One of her stories involves her meeting the strongest man in the world, and then out-strengthening him because who's to say a girl can't be stronger than a man? She is never going to get bug1 and she is unfailingly generous and her imagination is the finest thing in all the world. Who cares that she's not so good at pluttificiation?

(Admittedly, the math nerd in me does wince a little at that. But overall, as a teacher, I'd be thrilled to have someone as kind and creative and wonderful as little Pippilotta in my classes)

Pippi is an absolute ideal for me. Not only is she my physical ideal --I've wanted to be redhaired and far more freckly for basically ever, and I like myself best in pigtails, yes please-- but she's just so marvelously self-assured! Of *course* things are going to go the way of her wicked and wild imagination, that's just how things do!

((When I was in grade school, I was a certified Thing Finder, just like her. I still partake sometimes, although it's harder on a bicycle. But I've a shelf and a bit of random precious things I've scooped from the streets some days.))

(((And oh, do I ever want that chest of drawers. And a lifetime to fill it, and a thousand friends to empty it again. <3)))

She believes in climbing all around and over the house and up and down trees and she'd much rather be *in* the circus than watching the circus. I can't think of anything better --she's a little girl who is entirely independent and entirely under her own control and somehow seems perfectly happy that way. Ever since I finished college and started living in places where I've my own bedroom and few people to share my bed, I've been very aware of just how much self-love it takes to live on your own. I think I have that independence, and I suspect my early idolization of Miss Longstocking did nothing to abate it.


PostScript: I've been drawing the characters of the day, too! Right now they're only on Twitter --I'll try and upload them for real later. Days one and two. Day three.

1: “Pretty little chililug, I don't want to get bug.” --if you say big by accident, then you will grow taller and taller and taller and soon naught will be seen of you but your legs stretching into the sky.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Whuf. I have lost basically all of this weekend. It's...not good. Time to bring myself back to life, through whatever means possible.

(Mostly this means I'ma go upstairs and clean my room, probably.)

Characters I hella relate to numero two: Daria Morgendoffer.

Look, I am only human, and like every sarcastic brunette geek with childhood ties to the nineties or early aughts, I find myself reflected in Daria's deadpan glare. She is, in fact, the first character I ever cosplayed1! My first Dragon*Con I wandered around dressed as her on parade day, and was fortunate enough to meet some other Daria-ites. We all went and got pizza together --two Darias, two Janes, and a Trent. Absolutely fucking perfect.

A big part of my incentive for cosplaying Daria originally was that there are aren't a lot of characters out there with brown hair and big glasses. Fewer still characters who don't shave their legs. (What's that you say? The cartoon doesn't have enough detail to tell? Are you *really* going to sit here and tell me Daria --who hates conformity like it's her job-- is actually going to waste half an hour in the shower every morning to make herself look sexier to the scintillating young men at her school? _really?!_)

Getting right to the heart of it though, it was so valuable (as a freshman in college --I watched all five seasons of Daria during the summer of 2008) to have a protagonist who wasn't all delicate and bubbly and excitable. As I've mentioned before, my sense of humour is dead-babies-dark, and I speak sarcasm like a first language. Daria was the first of a new kind of hero, and I'll always find her existence of value.


1: Well, she's the first character I ever cosplayed of my own accord. For various Halloweens, with mom's help, I was the Pink Ranger, an M&M, and Pippi Longstocking, the last of whom will be getting their own post.

Oh right, and I suppose technically "Booty Chest Girl #6" and "Ashley J. Williams" both came before her too. Okay fine, so she's not actually my first cosplay but she's the first one I ever did at a con.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
((Disclaimer: I did *write* this yesterday, I just...braindeaded pretty hard and didn't get around to posting it. There should be another entry soon.))


Wabbit and I were contemplating the difficulties of narrowing it down to three characters with that meme that was floating around Facebook recently. Somehow, this turned into us egging each other on to do a full month of talking about characters that we like/relate to/represent us/etc. So that's gonna be October! If you wanna join us in talking about the characters you love, please do!

My first character is going to be Calvin, as in "...and Hobbes".

I grew up reading newspaper comics. Way way _way_ before I had webcomics, I was opening the back of the newspaper to see what was there. I probably read over half the comics the paper offered, every day for twelve straight years. When I wasn't reading the dailies, I was reading the many collections we had scattered throughout the house. Far Side, Foxtrot, Dilbert, Pearls Before Swine, Get Fuzzy...and damn near all of Calvin and Hobbes, one painstaking volume at a time.

I don't think I ever identified with Calvin growing up. If anything, I thought I was more a Susie character --I like learning, and I try not to disrupt class, and I think Hobbes is cute and boys are dumb. (I also (used to?) identify pretty heavily with Hobbes, in retrospect, because girls are pretty and I can actually get my wish if it's a sandwich.) But with years of retrospect to look back on, enhanced by spending enough time around a variety of children to have a really good understanding of what I must've been like, boy.


Calvin is me and I am him and there but for the grace of god go I. He loves to run around outside --loooooves it. Adventure and tree climbing and building weird things out of snow, and having an inspired and shouty relationship with the weather. He's a constant daydreamer, an investigator of Weird Stuff, an enjoyer of creepy-crawlies. He likes horrific movies and being scared out of his wits. He feels Very Very Strongly about his stuffed adventure buddy (and why haven't I shown everyone the picture of me and Lemonsnout that Tailsteak drew me for my birthday, note to self...)

He's smart and clever but he doesn't apply himself. He's easily distracted. He misses deadlines. He writes entire projects in a night, and hopes that maybe if he makes them flashy, they'll be enough to get him a good grade. (I, at least, am aware that bats aren't bugs.) He's impulsive sometimes and easily frustrated and is all about just lying on the couch all day eating sugar frosted chocolate bombs and watching cartoons.

For the past few months, I've been steadfastly ignoring the niggling little voice in my head that says I may be more Gryffindor than I'd really like. Calvin is the sorts of things I think of when I think red and gold. You think a Slytherin would try a homemade transmogrifier? Ha, noooo.

The Calvin part of my life is not the part I most want to encourage. It's very childlike and *very* inadequate, in terms of being basically the antithesis of my vague sense of Getting Things Done. But I can't deny that it's there, nor can I deny that I wouldn't really want it to go away for good.

He's a good kid. But oh, is it hard to be responsible for him.


(Relevant additions:

*Oh my good lawd, Geniuses has a website again!! This is my second-favourite romantic fic in the world. It's Calvin in college, and dating Jason Fox. YEP. IT'S PERFECT, OKAY!

*The aforementioned picture of me and Lemmers: ))
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Anyways, I didn't get home tonight until about 1:20 AM. Gosh Kat! Why were you out so late? I was out so late becausee.....


You may recall that last year [profile] jere7my and I went out to a ToysRUs at midnight in order to buy some ForceFriday toys. As it turns out, the midnight release for Rogue One toys was tonight, and so we went ahead for more adventure!

Unlike last year, I couldn't be arsed to obtain a car, so we biked. It's starting to get pretty chill out --I will not want to do a six mile post-midnight bike ride any later this year, for sure! But the road was light on traffic and hills. As a bonus, almost immediately after we met up in Arlington, we got a "GET A CAR, FAGGOT" shouted out the window by an asshole driver. jere7my yelled back "have a nice day!" (in a voice free of sarcasm, because he's amazing) while I just started laughing like a mad thing. Our mutual amusement set the tone for a lovely night.

Last year we were about 50th in line, this year there were approximately twelve patrons total, and we were numbers 4 and 5. That means we got free swag t-shirts! (oo, ahh --except I grabbed a large instead of a medium by accident, and they're FunkoPop which is not my favourite, but if push comes to shove, maybe I can give mine to Wabbit and certainly I can use it as a pillowcase or something.)

This year, I actually went in with a vague goal --I wanted a Jin figure scaled to go with my Rey and Leia. She was easy enough to find, and while poking around, I also found a Sabine from the Star Wars Rebels tv show. I have seen basically none of this, but blue-haired lady character who comes with a freaking zipline and enjoys graffiti and explosions? Look, I'm totally comfortable in my status as a fake geek girl, I'ma spend my money on her too!

((I am, actually, completely comfortable referring to myself as a fake geek girl. Firstly, for the same reason Nick Zerhakker in the Violet Drone wears t-shirts proclaiming thus --I'm not a girl, so it amuses me that the fake part of the equation applies unexpectedly. But secondly because I'm a grown ass-adult who doesn't have any pride wrapped up in knowing everything about everything and being the TWOOEST FAN! Anyone who would non ironically call me a Fake Geek Girl is automatically someone who doesn't want me (or on a broader scale, any but TWOO FANS) to join their hobby, and that means they're a stone cold fool.

I mean, I recognize that I'm sorta biased in that most of my most serious hobbies are heavily dying, but honestly, why the hell wouldn't you want more people into the things you like? Don't chase people away, that's how hobbies die!))

jere7my got several awesome things, including one of the fancy new Rogue One robot, and one of the superfancy "black box" stormtrooper models. I wavered a bit on the fancy Jin sculpt, but ultimately stuck with the 3.5" model, since it was cheaper and in scale with my other girls.

Then we biked home, where we saw a deer chilling out about ten feet away from the path. It was big and doofy looking and I genuinely like seeing deer, even though they're extremely low on the list of mammals I care for. (rats actually rate higher, even though I'm phobic, because I don't dislike them any.) (pandas are basically the bottom of the list because fuck pandas.)

And on that classy note, have a lovely night!

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Here are some things in my life right now!

*Triona is moving out. This sucks firstly because she is very wonderful and I will miss her a lot (She is going to Michigan, so it's not like "oh, I'll just see her slightly less often".) This sucks secondly because...I wanted to live in a stable house, with friends. I am so fucking sick and tired of constantly finding new people to move in, and I'm tired of living in a house that feels less like a community and more like a collection of strangers and I'm just blahhhhghgggg. I hate this.

I'm mostly managing to not be angry at her, because it's her leaving for an awesome job opportunity, back to the place she loves, and I can empathize too much with her being happy. But blaaaaaahhhhggg.

*On Saturday, I helped my friend Andy clean out her attic. This resulted in the removal of five giant "bagsters" (4x8 dumpster-tarps) filled with trash and recycling, and me coming home with slightly more Interesting Stuff than I intended. It was interesting and paid well, but now I need to find room in my closet for a gorgeous faux-fur coat (rather similar to the one that was lost to me in Maryland, MOM).

(I have already found a place to bring the spare tailcoat --I was not sure the tailcoat I bought for Magus's wedding was the right shade, so this one was a better black but fit much worse and was otherwise a bit ratty, but I've run both coats by Mary Ellen, queen of the world, and she thinks I am okay with the first. On Tuesday, I was chatting with Neil and realized suddenly that he's only a bit larger than I, and the second tailcoat might fit him just fine. And I *really* do not need two black tailcoats, especially since I already have my nice blue regency one and a prince charlie)

*On Sunday I had a really good accomplishment day, as noted. I also went to demo team rehearsal --we are prepping for our fall concert. The dances are SUPER GOOD but my brain has been SUPER NOT HERE in terms of feeling excited and engaged and invested the last couple weeks. Not sure what's up with that.

*On Monday, I became a Power Ranger. The orange one, natch. I was the one-on-one for a really friendly and well-behaved kid (*hisses "jackpot" under their breath*) who was super into power rangers, and you know, when given the choice between rolling ones eyes or being confused by a child's fantasy worlds or diving right in, I'd like to think I dive in, every time. It is admittedly easier when it's something that I was once super into as well.

Also, I went to Scottish and did at least half the dances, which is an extremely good track record for me these days.

*On Tuesday, I semi-spontaneously went to Bluesy after my nannying gig. Really, I needed to get a USB stick from [personal profile] gravitrue and give a tenner to Red (only the former of which I managed --I saw Red, and said "oh I need to give you a tenner!" and then promptly failed to do so at any later point.) but I was in the area anyways, and I do like Bluesy, I think.

Oh gods, was it a thing I needed though. More the following than anything else --I have been doing a lot of challenging dancing lately, and it has been largely awesome, but also largely *very* thinky. It felt amazing to just turn off my brain and do some high-level enjoyable dancing that I didn't have to think about. There were some fantastic leads on the floor that night, and I was very lucky to dance with all of them, apparently.

(That being said, boy did I wake up stiff on Wednesday. It's only sortof a joke when I say "ah yes, Blues, a completely *different* way to hurt my knees.")

*On Wednesday (today, for it is still night), I got the aforementioned news about Triona, but also went to Keezers to buy a vest. This was...this was everything I could have possibly wanted. Keezers is a big cramped building that makes no good attempt to differentiate whether it's open or not, and the entryway is crammed full of boxen and then you spill out onto the main floor which is a maze of racks of tuxedos and vests and hats. I got about six steps in --just one past the counter-- when a small middle eastern man stopped me, demanded to know what I was looking for, helped me try on a vest, and then when it was too big, found me one that actually worked.

(His slightly arch demeanor became much more friendly once it became obvious I was buying for myself, and that I knew enough about menswear to know what I was looking for.)

(Also, the vest was *way* cheaper than I was expecting, especially since it was apparently one of the rental vests that they sold me, and so I bought two pairs of cufflinks and a bright orange tie, all of which were also way cheaper than I would expect. I almost feel bad about this indulgence.)

*Also on Wednesday, I had Highland class. Which, it's worth noting, was hard and all, but during all the stretching I was reminded that the more often I do physical activity, the more flexible I get. I don't even necessarily need to be doing proper stretching each day --I certainly didn't at Tuesy-- just doing enough activity to keep my muscles warm and loose will cut it.

Anyways, we learned the third step of Blue Bonnets, which is a fucking nightmare step letmetellyou and I will be working on that for a good long time. It feels _wrong_. And yeah, a lot of Highland feels extremely weird to be doing, but most of it does not feel quite so badly like "I am actively pointing my body in the completely wrong direction for this step".

We're also starting to learn the hornpipe. Our advanced class classmates tell us they spent about six months learning the shuffle-over-the-buckle step that we're starting with, and I believe it --I am grasping it surprisingly well, but it's gonna be like high cuts, in that I'm gonna need to practice it basically forever before I get even moderately alright at doing it consistently.

(My high cuts, you will note, are still not consistent and I've been doing them for two years.)

See above note about how I've been doing a lot of very *thinky* dance. Highland is physical (BOY IS IT) but more than that, I don't really have any of it for which I can just say "eh, fuck it, I'll phone it in and enjoy the flow and automatic parts of the dance." Because the nature of it is so performative, and because I am still vastly a beginner and have many little things to improve, there is no "automatic".

It remains --and I have been saying this for at *least* six months-- unclear to me why I continue to do Highland. It hurts and it's hard and I don't really care about the competitive aspects and I don't really have any place to enjoy the performative ones. But...???

(It is a very satisfying hurt though. Even when I'm being so mentally off-balance with someone that I feel like I'm about to cry (see: third step of Blue Bonnets, all of Flora, the first six months of Seann Truibhass) it's a very satisfying challenge to be working out.)

That's me! I should copypaste some of this to my dance blog, shouldn't I?

sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Just woke up from an anxiety dream that seemed by the end to have absolutely no purpose except being an anxiety dream.

Things that happened include:

*Packing, and hilariously overpacking, and having to figure out how to not do that, and also I'm running late so I need to do it really quickly
*Our house being a laundromat and having tons of people hanging around
*Accidentally using the wrong name for a transitioning friend of mine1
*Having to go hit some fuses in the basement, but it's dark, so I turn on my phone flashlight only somehow it's incredibly difficult to navigate the app and I blind myself with the front facing light.
*Coming back from the basement, having to climb up a hill which is hosting the nice rescue men group (I dunno, like firefighters or something? Genuinely cool dudes) and their rescue dogs and I keep winding up closer and closer to the dogs and the dogs have bigger and bigger teeth and I start running and they think I'm playing and they start running and I DID NOT LIKE THIS PART.

(Fascinating sub-threads: That I knew the dogs were friendly/just playing, that apparently it's pretty heavily the teeth that freak me out, since some of the dogs were more or less *just* teeth. Decidedly unfascinating sub-thread: Freezing stock still while three of them strained at their tethers, trying to close the (very small) gaps between me and them.)

Oh, and the entire theme was "let's get ready to go to Magus and Keira's wedding!", which I swear I'm not anxious about. It's only an event that I'm not yet prepared for2 and I'm just not going to finish any of these thoughts in public holy shit. Magus may be my ex, but more importantly, he's a friend and a good one and I care for him very much and want him to be happy.

So yeah. On the plus side, I woke up minutes before my alarm, which is always charming. On the downside, I'm sitting here wibbling and not getting anything done yet. Sigh.

Another day of adventure!


1: Okay, in retrospect, this is really really cool, in terms of how my brain learns and processes information. I saw them sitting in the laundromat line, said "hey oldname --er, newname" and the fact that my brain knows enough to know that's something going on is really neat.

2: I need to obtain a white (nice!) vest in the very soon time range. Desperately need to hit up Keezers, not sure when they're gonna be open. Ah. 10-6. That is...hilariously useless to me, as timing goes. Maybe I can try and get down there Wednesday or Friday after school? Whee.

(10-6 is exactly the hours I have picked up with my nannying gig on Tuesdays and Thursdays. So, you know. Not exactly overlappable, especially because they're a couple miles apart.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)

I have had a mostly really good day. Sure, I played some video games and poked about Reddit, and no, I didn't get *everything* done that I wanted to, but I made some damn fine progress on Stuff.

Of course, I'm here, forty minutes until bedtime, trying to kick myself in the ass hard enough to make me go wash my hair. It is, thus far, not going well.

But mannnn, if I can write my words and wash my hair and brush my teeth --none of which is an impossible task, and all of which I should easily be able to do before midnight!-- then I will have a perfect day on Habitica. Which'll be a just splendid way of coming back and rejoining the team, since I have _not_ been doing well, and basically blanked out of existence for three days there. Yep. It's one of those weeks, and how.

In my defense, I was massively fatigued and sleeping a *lot* the last few days. So I may have been sick. I seem to have pulled through alright, although I was lagging --mentally/emotionally more than physically-- pretty badly at dance. Dunno exactly what was up with that. I was _prickling_ is what was happening, and I didn't want to interact with anyone, which is a difficult situ for a social dance, even if it's a formalized rehearsal sort of thing.

Anywho, for my own sanity, things what I accomplished today:

*Rented a car to get down to NJ in two weeks for Maguswedding
*Almost found a hotel room for same (they were having computer problems, I neglected to call back)
*Formatted and sent the TMC1 minutes and the Action Items list
*Did three complete loads of laundry (including my sheets!) and one partial load (I have not put away the hangy things yet)
*Brought in the various things I had in Laura's car.
*Ate several meals
*Practiced my Highland
*Bought tickets to go to Texas for Thanksgiving
*Changed my address with the Post Office
*Partially registered to vote (I still need to print and sign and mail a thing to be sure)
*Chatted with mom for like an hour and a half, about everything and everything else

Like I said, not as much as I could have done, but a goodly chunk and a good beginning. Maybe this upcoming week will be really impressive and splendid!

Things for the near future include finishing prepping for Magus's wedding (I need a vest! Anyone have a white formal vest in my size?), sorting out health insurance, and cleaning my room.

Excitement in the near future includes Sparr coming to visit, Magus's wedding (which I just realized earlier will involve lots of long car rides and listening to music and probably Munzeeing and rest stops and *heaven*!), and working on organizing/designing my room.

Life is not terrible. I am pretty pleased by it all, really.


1: Teaching and Music Committee. I have left the Exec committee for Scottish dance in Boston, and joined this one instead because...I hate myself and love parliamentary procedure? I have no goddamn idea.
sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Huh. I actually was mindful about going to bed last night and then this morning I was a) able to get up for the alarm on first call and b) able to think about doing things besides going back to bed.

How interesting[/s].

(I mean, mindful about bed still means only six hours of sleep, but damnit, six is the spot where things get sustainable! I can do six hours a night, every night, for a fairly substantial amount of time, and only feel a little fuzzy around the edges.)

But yes, it would seem that my brain responds slightly better to Unreasonable Demands (like awake) if it is well rested. I will have to continue to work on this.



sorcyress: Drawing of me as a pirate, standing in front of the Boston Citgo sign (Default)
Katarina Whimsy

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