rm sniped (and thus, changed) the smile-related comments I came here to make.
The other part that stood out to me:
It becomes self-selecting --the people who will seek me out will often (not always) be open minded sort of people, and the people who will avoid me entirely will often (not always) be the sort of people who think I'm going to hell forever...
This is an awesome trick and can be used in many contexts, not just cross-dressing to signal queerness. I've spent many years getting a similar effect out of wearing really stupid-looking hats. It's a magnetic effect, making some people more likely to interact with you and others less. Done rightly, it gets you the people you want and pushes away the ones you don't. (I hope to some day figure out what elements attract/repel what sorts of people, but in the meantime, trial and error is working reasonably well.)
no subject
The other part that stood out to me:
It becomes self-selecting --the people who will seek me out will often (not always) be open minded sort of people, and the people who will avoid me entirely will often (not always) be the sort of people who think I'm going to hell forever...
This is an awesome trick and can be used in many contexts, not just cross-dressing to signal queerness. I've spent many years getting a similar effect out of wearing really stupid-looking hats. It's a magnetic effect, making some people more likely to interact with you and others less. Done rightly, it gets you the people you want and pushes away the ones you don't. (I hope to some day figure out what elements attract/repel what sorts of people, but in the meantime, trial and error is working reasonably well.)